


Cold As Frostbite

by ninjakitty15



Series: Immortal Peril [3]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Evil Exes Strike Back, F/M, Immortal Peril Series, Jotunn Loki (Marvel), King Loki, Loki (Marvel) Does What He Wants, Protective Loki (Marvel), Witches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:28:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 24
Words: 45,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25456219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninjakitty15/pseuds/ninjakitty15
Summary: With great power comes great anxiety, that is especially the case with Loki as once his own has been returned to him, the magically enhanced Avengers believes he's a threat once more. It certainly doesn't help when Nell's mentor appears with a warning something much worse and much stronger is coming their way, forcing Loki's demons to resurface. Not wanting to lose Nell again after he just got her back (from Cold as Hell), Loki, Thor, and Nell go offworld to seek aid and allies against this oncoming threat lurking beyond the horizon before it's too late and his demons come home to roost.
Relationships: Amora/Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) & Original Female Character(s), Loki (Marvel)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Immortal Peril [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1497122
Kudos: 12





	1. Meat's Back On the Menu!

"I'm sure you've had a long, full, carefree life in your time, and I've been told you lot are practically immortal, nothing natural can kill you but unfortunately for you I'm not natural myself and therefore your time has come to an end," I stated at my prey with abject hunger. "I can't promise it will be quick and painless as you probably deserve but it's for a good cause so there's that." I watched it tried to squirm and wiggle out of my grasp but it's main defenses were already bound.

"No wonder Lady likes you, you play with your food just as much as she does," Loki commented from the entrance to the kitchen, leaning against the frame with crossed arms and an arched eyebrow.

"It's not a common thing for my food to be still alive when I get it, despite popular belief," I half ass defended before dropping my prey into a pot of boiling water and holding down the lid over it to keep it from escaping.

"A shame, this planet could do with trimming off ugly fat," Loki joked.

"No one's stopping you from accomplishing that," I reminded him.

"My brother might," Loki muttered in turn.

I snorted. "Let Steroid Addiction Barbie try."

Loki snickered at this before his expression turned serious and his head turned sharply in the direction of the door and he instantly was encased in green light, causing the recently changed bulbs around him in the house to flicker and me to scowl at him. 

"Stop speeding up the warranty on my LED's," I warned the god.

He held a finger to his lips and motioned for me to stay in the kitchen while he went for the front door, a dagger appearing in one hand. We both waited in silence as I trusted Loki had sensed something I couldn't first and wondered first who and what would ever use the front door if they were about to break in or attack.

"If you insist on using the front entrance, perhaps we should knock first," a faint, distinctly male British accent suggested.

"And alert them to our presence?" a slightly Russian sounding accented voice hissed back. "We were already warned they're both dangerous and getting stronger."

Loki stole a glance at me with a very amused look as we could both hear them from the other side of the door. I held back a snicker of amusement myself, so there was at least two outside and from the sounds of it they were close enough to bicker right before confronting us. There was a moment of absolute silence before Loki took a few steps back and that's when the door was blasted off its hinges by red light and energy. Loki was quick to not only shield himself more from it flying off but myself as well and sent a ball of magic at the first person he spotted in the doorway that was sent flying back and away from our home. That's when an odd looking multi colored dude in a cape appeared out of thin air and shot at Loki with a glowy gem on his forehead. Having dealt with stoneheads before I set my sights on him as Loki was thrown back by the power of it and hit a wall. Not thinking so much as reacting to Loki being overpowered like that, I dove for the floating intruder, sliding under his feet and snatching his one distinct article of clothing from behind with hands of just bone and death magic, throwing him out of the house and into the other assailant as she attempted to enter.

"No capes," I snapped at the grounded dude, putting myself between them and Loki, straightening my arms against my sides and calling forth my restless army.

Rotting arms and heads burst from the ground around the two, grabbing and gnashing at them hungrily. The first attacker I saw as a young woman with glowing red fists, tried to keep off my army as they reached for them, the second instantly saw it was me behind them and attacked me with his stone to stop it all. Loki however was having none of that and deflected the attack with narrowed glowing eyes. When it looked like Loki was becoming overpowered by the power of Mr Stoner again, I decided to break his concentration and really let my minions have at the woman they were after, she couldn't destroy the bodies as fast as they came and grabbed for her, causing her to cry out in shock as several hands snatched her leg and long red jacket. That was all that was needed to snag the other's attention and give Loki the upper hand again and a ball of green magic sent the dude flying. I smirked as Loki moved swiftly to stand beside me, staring down the dude as he got back up, his glare directly on the stone while I kept the woman busy.

"If we finish this now, that lobster will be just right to pull out and crack open, much like that woman is about to be," I mused.

That's when the sky suddenly got dark and heavily clouded, stormy even as it rumbled and cracked and Loki instantly stiffened more with the most annoyed look yet. Bolts of lightning literally struck the ground where my zombies were half hidden, forcing them to let go of their own prey enough she was able to shake off the remaining and the floating dude instantly was at her side though before either of us could make a move, more lightning struck the ground between and then lo and behold there stood Buzzcut Beefy Barbie.

"You always had the worst timing, brother," growled Loki at the new referee.


	2. Witches Be Crazy

For one agonizing moment, no one made a move as the unnecessarily armored Asgardian glared at Loki and narrowed his eyes more at me. That moment was broken of course by the sound of my oven alarm blaring, causing me to break eye contact instantly.

"My dinner!" I bolted back inside without a second thought and hastily turned off the stove, opening the lid to check on it and breathed a sigh of relief, boiled to perfection.

"Tell your woman my friends are not her friends food while she's in there," growled Thor from outside still.

"Afraid to tell her yourself?" challenged Loki evenly. "They attacked us first, we have every right to see them out and gone as we see fit."

Thor opened his mouth to protest but stopped and glanced at the couple apparently on his side. "Is this true?"

"In our defense, I did suggest we knock first," the caped stoner muttered. "But was otherwise convinced we shouldn't alert them before entering."

I snorted while prepping my dinner. "You two were so magically charged, I could've blasted you both blindfolded with one hand behind my back."

That seemed to stir the woman the wrong way as her hands started to glow red again but it was the male that held out his arm to stop her.

"What is that creature you were cooking?" asked Thor curiously. "And may we come in?"

"You may because you asked nicely, those two can take a long walk off a short pier," I replied dryly. "It's a lobster, care for a leg?"

Loki snickered at this, causing Thor to give him a disproving look to which Loki just rolled his eyes at, demi gods or not, those two were true siblings between their unspoken reactions to each other.

"Thor, how do you know that woman exactly?" asked the man, completely unphased by my hostility.

"The same way Loki does, we found her locked in a secret Hydra chamber we happened to be raiding at the time," Thor replied easily.

"She's the one Tony was talking about, she's the necromancer that helped put an end to Hydra for good?" the woman asked incredulously.

"And who are you, Red Riding Hood?" I retorted.

"My apologies for the late introductions," Thor hastily amended. "This is Wanda the Scarlet Witch and her beloved one Vision."

"A witch you say? And this is how you chose to enter Witch City? Openly attacking one of its welcomed residents?" Loki mocked.

"I'm calling bullshit, there's nothing wiccan about that one," I agreed.

"It's just her codename really," Vision tried to smooth over.

"Should've fed you both to my zombies," I muttered.

"What exactly was your reasoning for attacking these two?" Thor interrupted, directing his question at the new couple.

"Vision and I both felt something dark and powerful brewing here and those two are the source of it."

I snorted at this admission again. "Again, this is witch city, that's kinda normal around here. Also have the two of you looked in a mirror, pot and kettle feeling there."

"She's right considering the both of you are powered by an infinity stone," Loki sneered. "Our power comes from something much more natural just like this city is."

"There is nothing natural about zombies," growled Wanda.

"Let she who is without magic cast the first spell," I retorted. "I'm just recycling everyone else's leftovers, go green or go home."

"Nell," warned Thor in a deep tone. "Perhaps we can all settle this like mature adults."

"They started it," I muttered. "Breaking open our door without reasonable cause, should make them pay for the repairs. And now my lobster's getting cold."

"Should think you're used to cold things living with a Frost Giant," sneered Wanda.

Even before both Loki or I could retaliate in any way to that, Thor whirled around and advanced on her in a second. "You may be my ally, but you will not insult my brother like that, take care how you speak around me and my family."

I glanced over at Loki curiously who had a slightly stunned expression of his own as it seemed even he hadn't expected Thor to stand up for him so easily.

"I apologize on my love's behalf," Vision cautiously spoke up. "We were wrong to confront them like we did without knowing all the facts first, especially in their own home."

"Vision," warned Wanda. "You don't speak for me."

"You're not exactly helping to diffuse the situation," he chided. "The team met these two and housed them for a while, if they're as much a threat as we first believed, do you really think Tony would let his favorite hero in training stay with them for a weekend?"

That caught my attention. "Ah that little spider powered dork. How's he doing these days, been a while since we texted."

"He wishes he took more pictures of his trip here and wants to visit during your All Hallow's Eve," Thor answered first.

"We already told him, he's welcome to visit then or any other time," Loki stated. "It's his move to do so or not."

"As long as he doesn't let the dogs out again," I added.

"Agreed, our feline companion is getting fat from them, we need her back on the rodent diet to keep her healthy."

"How dare you, Lady Catalie is not a fat kitty, she's just really fluffy and muscled from hunting things bigger than her all the time."

"I beg your pardon, you two got a pet together?" asked Thor in an unmistakably amused tone.

"She found us actually," Loki corrected. "Should be back from her hunt any moment too."

On cue, an unmistakable meow of victory was heard from outside before my favorite ball of fluff came charging into the room and right for Loki's legs he was at this point accustomed to avoiding before the cat slowed down and began rubbing against mine.

"Loki says you're getting fat, but you're just fluffy, aren't you, sweety?" I asked the cat as I picked her up.

"It could also be you spoiling her rotten that's doing it," teased Loki.

I arched an eyebrow. "Like you don't do the same for me?"

"That's entirely different, you're not my pet and you also aren't the hunting type, the only live thing you eat you get from the fish market."

I shrugged innocently. "I mean I could always start and complete the stereotype but then good brains are so hard to find these days and I'm trying to watch my ghoulish figure." I buried my face in the fluff for a moment. "What do you think, should we play house and allow more than Thor into ours?" She responded with a satisfied mew and a headbutt against mine. "The tribe has spoken, Thor take a seat and grab a leg or three, I got dibs on the claws. Vision, if you can promise both you and the Red Queen won't attack or mean us and ours any harm, you can come inside as well, but one of yall needs to fix the door, that's entirely on you for not knocking first like a normal fucking person."


	3. Can't Touch This

"So you're what happened to my scepter," muttered Loki, studying the android curiously. "Of course this is what Stark does with this kind of power, attach it to some kind of trademark technology of his and call it another invention."

"Call us what you like but at least at one point in my life I was just another flesh and blood mortal," I added. "Not an AI or piece of machinery. You wanna talk about being unnatural?"

"Controlling dead people isn't?" challenged Wanda defensively.

"Would you rather it be living people controlled like that stone did way back?"

"Or what you almost did to your own team when you first met them," added Loki, his voice dropping dangerously to a low growl. "Invading their mind and making them see their biggest fears to cover your own in facing them."

That seemed to hit a nerve with her and her eyes began to glow red. "That's real classy coming from an intergalactic war criminal."

"As opposed to just an international criminal?" I interceded once more. "Hey, who's got two thumbs and isn't on this dimensions Most Wanted list? This bitch," I pointed both my thumbs at myself then. "You should try it sometime."

"How is that possible?" asked Vision.

"Because I have people already dead help me out and how exactly are you going to hunt down and arrest a body I can easily put back to rest and in the grave before the cops figure out who's fingerprints are all over it. Also I don't exist and you can't arrest people that don't exist, not that you'd get very far if you tried."

"Don't exist?"

"No last name, no DNA matches no fingerprints, nothing but a dead girl walking."

Wanda narrowed her eyes then and I suddenly felt a faint tingling in the back of my head causing me to smirk and I glanced at Loki with a wink before the tingling stopped and Wanda screamed, clutching her head and crying blood as well having a nosebleed. 

"Nell, what did you do to her?" demanded Thor who finally finished the dinner we offered the more civil of the three guests.

"Not a damned thing, she did that to herself. I don't care what kind of power you have or what it came from, you can't touch this," I replied. "That's what happens when you run head first into a brick, adamantium, and vibranium built wall."

"She's not a telepath, brother," Loki assured him as he saw Thor start to spark up. "Though I was under the belief this would not continue, you gave us your word."

"This is true. Wanda why must you keep this up after agreeing this wouldn't? What would Captain Rogers think if he saw you acting so irresponsible and childish?"

"Me? I'm the one in pain and bleeding here?" she whined.

"You tried to invade my mind, sweetheart. That alone has malicious intent all over it so I shouldn't have to warn you not to when the idea alone is bad let alone going through with it. Much like exploding the door instead of knocking, it's your own damn fault. If you're going to just be a pain in the ass here, I'm feeding you to my army. Seriously, why the fuck are you here?"

"There's been a sudden surge in power, both Wanda and myself felt it and when we looked deeper into the cause, it led us here. Near as I can tell, Loki alone has never radiated this much in his power before," Vision explained

"You'll have to talk to Mr. Strange about that one," I told him. 

"The sorcerer with the time stone?" Thor spoke up. "I don't understand, what does he have to do with all this?"

"He didn't give me everything he took when he released me from house arrest. Until recently I had been unwittingly defending myself with one hand tied behind my back and another limb missing," Loki growled. "That's no longer the case though."

"And how exactly did you get it back?" challenged Wanda. "Since you claim you were unaware of this."

"I had help of course."

"From her?"

"In a fashion," I answered for them. "So that power flux you felt came from him finally being able to be himself again, mystery solved, get the fuck out."

"Nell," Thor warned.

"She's right on all accounts, this isn't your domain, brother, you don't make the rules here, we do. You've broken into our property and blatantly attacked us without any solid reason other than you had a bad feeling and even when you claim you mean no harm you still insist on being a massive pain and of no good will or intention."

"Loki, what has gotten into you?" Thor demanded.

"That stone in his head, the one that gave her powers and keeps him from being just an AI caused me nothing but pain and misery the moment I knew of it and even much later with different wielders and different causes, it still persists but not just to me anymore. You both need to leave, of all the infinity stones, that one in front of me is my least favorite. Where the space stone could give me infinite freedom, that gave me infinite Hel."

While Thor stared at him in horror and sadness at that admission, I on the other hand stood up from my dinner then. The lights flickered and then shorted out around me. "You should leave while you still have legs to run with."

"Are you threatening me?" Wanda demanded.

"I'm telling you your options right now. If I ever see you opposing me again, I'm ripping your soul right out of your body and making him watch," I snarled. "He knew exactly what that thing did to Loki before he acquired it and he still pranced around like it was old news. I might be dead inside but at least I still have a soul which is more than I can say for you, T-800."

"If I had not intervened, what would you two have done?" asked Thor to the guests.

Wanda was silent while Vision actually looked remorseful if not ashamed. "Initially we planned to simply investigate but once we got here, there was so much dark energy, we were convinced a great evil had to be hidden here."

"You call yourself a witch yet you stand here a witch hunter," Loki sneered. "That's how this city came to be known, built by the blood and bodies of the wrongfully accused, tortured till they gave them what they wanted which was simply their lives in the end. So I think the answer to your question, brother, is most likely they were going to destroy us."

"Or die trying, preferrably," I added. 

"I might be the god of mischief, but of the two of us, you're the one that trouble seems to follow in the worst way," Loki informed Thor. "If you wish to visit us in the near future, I strongly suggest you come alone."

"No witnesses that way," I chirped.

Thor actually looked downtrodden by Loki's last statement, if the circumstances were different this might have been a complete role reversal of Thor being shot down by Loki rather than the usual Loki hoping for Thor's approval and being shot down. He nodded solemnly and ushered the couple out without another word, Vision going as far as putting the door back together himself with the stone's power. 

There was a long moment neither myself nor Loki spoke or moved before I relaxed first and looked over at my lover curiously. "Well that went over like a fart in church. I have exorcised the demons!" I exclaimed raising up my hands to reach the heavens. "This house is clear."

Loki attempted to relax as well though his expression still tense and taut. "I thought Dr. Strange was the worst of the A team if he counts as such but I was mistaken."

"A girl and an android, both of whom aren't terribly sure who they are or where they fit in? Pft, no problem once you pick up on the fact they aren't so different from us."

Loki turned his full attention on me with a quizzical look. "What do you mean?"

"The android that shouldn't be alive but is kept alive by a stone of power with no past of his own, no memory of a life before the stone was put there the reanimator. A youngish magic wielder with a dark and terrible past haunted by the lives she was forced to take after she was taken by an army of evil and used as a weapon for their own personal gain. C'mon, we easily fit those bills ourselves. Our power sources are the opposites of each other while theirs are basically two branches from the same trunk, our power is natural, it's deep and ancient and always there. Theirs...infinity stones might be old and powerful but they ain't that natural. We're also a lot older and stronger than they are I'm betting. The android doesn't know the full extent of what that stone can do for him."

"Similar or not, if I see them again, I'm destroying that stone."

"Is that even possible?"

"With a great deal of power, yes."

Something about that unsettled me, yes Loki was now more powerful than ever but from what both Loki and Tony before him had told me, the infinity stones were still ancient and made by celestial beings that were there at the very beginning of time and space. Plus before Strange stole some of his power, he had been in constant contact with that stone before and it broke him to the point he still feared its power later when it was no longer used against him like that. I studied Loki worriedly, it wasn't often that he lost his confidence but I could tell it was beginning to slip.

"Hopefully they got the message never to cross paths with us again," I noted. "I'm sure that would have the A team on our ass like a fat kid on cake."

"You needn't worry about them, I can always take us somewhere they'd never find us and still live our lives peacefully."

"Was hoping this would be our forever home," I muttered. 

"I know, my love, but now too many people we might have to cross blades with know where we live."

"Let them come," I growled. "This is my home now, I'll defend it till there's no one left or it's burnt to the ground."


	4. Aging of Technologies

"What's this I hear about you banishing my Vision and Wanda from your home?" asked Tony Stark the second I answered a not so random skype call on my laptop the next day.

"They blasted my antique door off its hinges and proceeded to attack without reasonable cause, you know who else attacks people unjustly these days without probable cause? Racist cops for one, only gets worse the farther down on that list you go. If Thor hadn't intervened at least one of them would be zombie food," I groaned, curling up on the couch with a big fuzzy blanket and cup of cocoa. "I thought your team was better than to just shoot first, ask questions later regardless of what state the target is in after. At least one of you is smart enough to gather all the facts first, did you not instill that with Vision?"

"You're still housing an intergalactic wanted alien that just so happens to be the source of a massive power flux recently, they had to be cautious," Tony tried to reason.

"Then they should've fucking knocked first," I snapped. "And that power flux was actually a certain caped wizard withholding more than just the truth from Loki here, you wouldn't know anything about that, would you?"

Tony frowned from his end of the screen. "What exactly was he withholding?"

"Some of Loki's power, whatever y'all did when you first allowed him refuge on this planet, it involved both keeping him physically and magically contained, that's what I was told at least. But according to a very reliable source, Dr. Strange actually kept some of Loki's magic for himself after that magical house arrest was lifted and only recently was it returned to him."

"You know I wouldn't know about stuff like that, Strange and I rarely see eye to eye as it is, he polices the Harry Potter world, I protect just about everything else, that was the arrangement so we didn't end up stepping on each other's toes...if he ever sets foot on solid ground."

"And that's why he's been watching our every move since I was released by you guys from Hydra, that's apparently his jurisdiction despite Thor being on your team and thus Loki being your jurisdiction otherwise."

"Yeah well, now we have one more thing in common, we both don't trust that floating bastard with good reason."

I snorted at this. "Kinda figured you two got along, being facial hair bros and all."

"Please, he wishes he could pull that look off like only I can. Back to the matter I was calling though, why does Wanda want your head on a scarlet platter?"

"You mean besides attempting to feed her to my zombies for trespassing? She also tried to hack into my mind and that too didn't end well for her. You know, for a guy that loves his privacy, you dropped the ball on teaching either of those two the issue of boundaries."

Tony rolled his eyes at me. "If it means anything, I still trust you at least. Loki is another matter entirely, what with him throwing me out a window and almost destroying my tower and the city it was in, in the process. I'll talk to them and Thor as a witness about what happened earlier but I wanted to hear it from you first as you always seemed too laidback to make the first move."

"She's lucky I didn't bring up her haunters, there's so many of them too," I warned.

"I know, but I'm sure you can understand as you're also housing someone with a past painted in blood, we're working on that and giving her a chance to prove that's all behind her."

"It wasn't just her that was the problem though, albeit she was the leading cause. The stone on Vision, it opened old wounds for Loki, the two of them can't be near us no matter what their intentions are."

Tony was silent, probably connecting the dots I hinted at about the stone and his frown deepened. "You really care about him, don't you?"

"I'd burn this world and more for him," I replied dead serious.

Tony studied me for a moment before nodding. "Peter trusts you two, I trust you mostly, not sure about Clint and Nat but no one really knows their votes on anything but each other, for the most part you specifically left a decent impression on them, I think Vision is still undecided, you know how it is, he wants to make peace, his girlfriend wants war and he just wants her happy..."

I snickered. "The poor bastard. So basically Wanda is the Simon Cowell of your group of judges, I just won't sing in her presence."

"Dr. Strange would be the better Simon, definitely has the attitude down to a T. Do I have to talk to him too about the whole collecting interest on Loki's deposit?"

"Nah, like you said, wouldn't want to step on his fancypants toes and he's more or less no longer a problem now that Loki's got his groove back."

"Why not?"

"My source took care of it is all I can tell you, I was a bit pinned with bad blood issues from the past when it happened."

"Bad blood or black blood?"

I snorted. "Wasn't mine, well some of it was actually but that's why we invented hydrogen peroxide, right?"

"We? I invented a suit of armor so I wouldn't need to use blood removing liquids."

"It's not all about you, Stark, some of us are living in the modern age where armor is only worn by dummies in museums."

"And in this modern age, what pray tell protects you from enemies of which I'm betting there's tons?"

"I think if you ask little Red Riding Witch, you'll find the answer is zombies and gods."

"You really don't like her, do you?"

"I moved to Salem to get away your shenanigans and find some much needed peace and then this shit happens in my own fucking home. For no fucking reason other than they got bad vibes. That's some prejudiced bullshit right there. It's cuz I'm black isn't it?"

"You should take your complaints up with Fury on that one, I'm sure he'd love to hear that."

"Pirate Shaft? Nah I'm good, have a feeling he'd try to recruit me or something if I get on his radar again, secret organizations are predictable that way."

"Well you can't blame him, there's strength in numbers and you have an infinite number of bodies at your command."

"Speaking of infinite, get that stone off Vision's head, dude. He's worse than Son Goku with the dragonball on his hat. There's a reason Thor can't find the rest of them, they've already been found by someone else, someone that's looking for yours and isn't into sharing or trading with them."

"How do you know this?" Tony asked quietly.

"Oh come on, the same stone on his head now was used on not just your team but my housemate, something yall seem to forget about that invasion. The thing that used it on him knows how to wield the stones and he was after the space stone when the invasion came. It's not a hard concept, he's hunting them and closing in, get it off Vision and destroy the ones you have."

"Loki told you all this stuff about them and the invasion?"

"Why are you so surprised? Of the two of us, which one welcomed him with no judgment or conditions and which one muted almost all that makes him him just so they could sleep a little better at night?" I arched an eyebrow smugly at Tony who rolled his eyes at being called out.

"He threw me out a damned window!"

"You came out fine first of all, second of all let it go, Elsa. Despite the fact he was more or less taking orders the entire time through the stone and therefore you house arresting him goes against the Geneva Convention, he still did his time. What's really fucked up is he was still paying for it long after you claimed he was a free man, you seriously need to reconsider who you let on your team, dude."

"Just because a few of them don't trust you two, doesn't make them bad people."

"Court's still out on that, Loki was forced to attack yall, I actually haven't done anything to warrant any attacks, I helped you from the moment you freed and housed me and yet you still had team members I don't even fucking know come onto my property and fuck things up. Not cool, bro. Ground your children or so help me, I'll put them in the ground myself."

"Did you just threaten my kids?"

"I'm telling you your options. At least Peter still likes and respects me..and fucking knocks before he enters."

"He won't shut up about you and Salem, thanks for that."

"Yeah well, thanks to you I got another unwanted visit or three from Strange because Peter showed you what he found out before we even knew he was here and you had to go and tell Strange because you got nothing better to do than cause us more unwanted drama. Sorry not sorry. You could've easily just called us and we could've handled it or at least told you Peter would be in good hands till he got back which turned out to be true so stick that in your blasters and shoot it."

"I'm not going to win this one, am I?"

"Nope, the dead don't lie, Tony, so I hope you got your umbrella ready because it's raining some cold hard facts. Destroy the stones, and keep little red riding witch out of my reach, peace out!" I ended the call then and pinched the bridge of my nose in annoyance. "There's too many superheroes here, this planet needs a new villain."

"Be careful what you wish for, love," a smooth voice purred from behind the couch I was on, making me shiver with excitement.

I dropped my head back to look at him upside down and sighed a little, that god could make anything he wore, even a damned trashbag look good on him. He of course was only in his usual lounge robes again as we had no plans on kicking ass and taking lives. "How the hell did you manage to live with these idjits as long as you did?"

"The A team? Not without great difficulty, of that I can assure you. Pulling simple pranks on the less serious of them did help in keeping entertained." He effortless slid down onto the couch and next to me before pulling me, blankets and all against him and on his lap I easily curled into. "And then you came along and suddenly it wasn't such a hassle living there."

"Well yeah because I kept you busy with Hydra and then we were allowed to move out, you're welcome." I shifted around on him before straddling his legs to look at him straight on and damn near got lost in those glittering orbs in his skull.

"You have a real talent for keeping me busy," he cooed.

"A bad god is a bored god, idle hands are the devil's playthings."

"Not a fan of dangerously horned deities?" he teased.

"Your helmet is about as over the top as Thor's overall attitude or Stark's inventions," I retorted. "How do you not get it caught on low hanging things or ceilings when you're already freakishly tall as it is?"

"What would you have me adorn on my head then?" he challenged. "While still befitting of me."

"Does it have to still be a helmet?"

"If I were to follow Asgardian armor, preferably but now I'm curious if you have other ideas."

"Gimme a pencil and paper and I'll show you, not everyone can just create whatever pops in their heads."

Loki rolled his eyes but held out a hand and both were summoned and handed to me. I sketched out a rough idea of what would be passable for headwear for him that wasn't an overall golden eyesore. It still had the horns but it was more a crown or small headdress that wrapped around his head not so much covering it completely, a few green gemstones decorating it as well. The horns were smaller but no less impressive, just less showy.

"Sometimes you'll find, size isn't everything, its how you use it." I showed him my sketch once I was satisfied as I wasn't exactly the artistic type.

"Normally I'd remind you that you yourself know that to be false concerning me but in this one instance you might actually be right." He took my sketch and studied it. "It's fitting for a ruler but as neither of us have a real kingdom to do that with, what would protect my head in battle?"

"Worried a bunch of dwarves are after it?" I teased.

He scoffed. "Stop using false tales of my doing against me, you know they're not true."

My eyes dropped to his lips as I recalled the tale I mentioned, no signs of scars from them being stitched shut but would it leave scars at all? "Not a whole lot of people aim for the head, I mean look at the A team, I think only Tony and Rhodes wear headgear, maybe Capsicle if he's feeling like he needs to hide his face. You would think Vision would wear something to at least cover that ugly ass stone on him but he literally only wears a cape. And they're all still alive and fighting so that's gotta mean something right? No one aims for the head around here."

"So you're sold on the crown over a helmet of any kind then?"

"You're a prince if not a king and contrary to the Norse and Asgardian beliefs, not all kings need to be warriors all the time so you don't need to wear a damned helmet all the time either. I would follow you more as a ruler despite hating all authority than I would a warrior, I can fight my own battles and have my own army to lead, why should I let you make the first move in war?"

"If I did not know just how effective you are in battle, I would've said you sounded like a younger Thor before he was banished to Midgard by Odin. However, Thor only took myself and his friends into battles on his own, you always have your army in the end, don't you?"

"And no one calls the shots on them but me, that's why you can't lead me in battle, they answer to my call, not anyone else's. They can get their own damn army of undead or otherwise, this one is taken."

"Just as you are," Loki added, pulling me closer against him and dropping the coy act.

"I am? Then by all means...come and claim me."


	5. Happy Hunting Games

"So an entire town built on the blood of the innocent falsely accused of what it now celebrates exclusively, what a wild thought, no wonder you chose to live here!"

"There's in fact many places like this just in the country, Louisiana is big on voodoo for instance where we are big on Wicca and paganism," I explained. "The main reason I love this place though is because its where the weird are welcomed and my favorite holiday is celebrated in full."

"I should like to experience this favored holiday of yours then, if you'll allow me," beefcake Barbie suggested.

"Don't make a mess of the place and you'll do just fine."

Thor grinned happily. "I'm glad you've forgiven me my mistake in bringing Vision and Wanda here for their investigation, I didn't realize they were aiming right for you two when they described what they both sensed."

I shrugged, not one to hold grudges that were easy to forget. "You weren't the one that blew off my door and declared war on my property, all is amended."

"I am also glad Loki chose you, you are good for him, I can see it. I was beginning to worry he would never find anyone while he lived here and would either die here alone or eventually slip away to another realm and find someone there and I'd never see him again."

I arched an eyebrow at the last bit. "Sounds to me like you're more worried about leaving him alone than him actually being alone, lost your novelty in Midgard have you? The fangirls no longer swarming you like horny bees?"

"I am Thor Odinson, god of thunder, I can get any lady I want! It just so happens that being a hero means being alone so your enemies can't use anyone against you."

"So being in love is considered a weakness to you then, interesting," I teased. "Loki tells me your people consider him the heartless one and all along it's been you."

"I'm not heartless, I'm cautious."

"Whatever makes you sleep at night, hun."

Thor folded his arms and scoffed before sipping his drink and looking around him. "So Loki has all he needs now, his powers in full, a woman by his side, a home and a place that welcomes him openly. Is it because he's a god? Would that work with me here?"

"They welcome him as a god of magic or seidr as I've been informed, many other magic users choose which gods best represent their craft and he's among the choices. You're just the god of grumpy weather, not much to be impressed with there."

"Not much impressed?! Do they know I'm also an Avenger too?"

"Which are primarily mortals, nothing to worship there. Are you jealous Loki finally found a place to belong in?"

Thor slammed his hands onto the table we were eating at in one of my favorite restaurants by the sea. "Of course not! It's just...I wanted it to be a place for me as well."

I rolled my eyes at his blatant clingyness. "You can't have it both ways, you grew up in a place the reveled in you and what you do for it and look what that did to him, what they did to him. Your own fucking father being the leading cause of that in fact! You two are polar opposites so you don't stand a snowball's chance in hell in finding that with him, when your own mutual home didn't agree with him."

"Well that's not fair," he grumbled.

"Damn right it's not, yet it went on for centuries till he finally snapped with all your people's bullshit. For someone that's known him since pretty much birth, you haven't even scratched the surface, have you?"

Thor was uncharacteristically quiet for a moment, letting what I said finally sink in his abnormally thick skull. "It's just, I thought in the beginning our paths would always be together and then he had that spurt of wickedness with the Grandmaster and I figured he was back to his old ways and I lost him from the side of good for good. And then when we were forced to move here after the destruction of our home, he seemed to be leaning toward my side again but at the same time leaning away."

"You do realize that he was also forced to be on your side when he moved here or he'd be locked up by Shield for who knows how long, right? Just as he was forced into pretty much any situation he's been blamed for, he was forced into attacking New York and then forced into aiding the people he attacked and what did you do while all this was happening I wonder?" I sipped my Long Island iced tea smugly. "This city is famous for its first people being wrong accused of dark magic, and here lives a magic user wrongly accused of dark things."

"What are you saying?"

"You're part of the reason your paths have split apart is all." I shrugged.

"You've known him such a short time and are so ready to defend him, why?"

"I love him is the long short of it, you've known him the longest yet you do the opposite, curiously enough. I didn't invite you here to point fingers of course but as I'm always on his side when it comes him, you kinda had that coming."

"Why did you invite me then?"

"Loki tells me you've had some fairly decent exposure to the stones, right? You gotta make the team destroy the ones you have, they're basically massive beacons to any and all things after them."

"We've had the stones for years without much trouble."

"Thanks to Strange's meddling in powers that didn't belong to him while being attached to his own stone, when Loki got his full power back it set off a chain reaction that resulted in Vision and Wanda sensing something from us but it goes both ways. Earth I'm betting isn't a highly magical planet, Loki tells me there's a magic wielder among those that forced him to attack here as well."

Thor looked mortified then at the last bit. "He told you what happened after he fell from the bifrost?"

"Well yeah, why wouldn't he? Trauma heals better when there's people willing to listen, sharing is caring after all."

"He wouldn't tell me anything about it..."

"Can't imagine why," I muttered. 

"Where is he now?"

I groaned and chugged the rest of my drink. "If he wanted to see you, he'd be here already. I'm not at liberty to say otherwise. What you need to actively focus on is getting rid of the stones. Loki's spent most of his life trying to live up to your expectations, now it's your turn. May the odds be ever in your favor." I stood up, taking some money out of a pocket to pay for the bill.

Thor stood up as well, finishing his beer quickly and following me out like a lost puppy and I suddenly understood just how Loki felt about his brother. "What must I do to win his favor?"

"He warned me you were thick skulled. You don't just win it, this isn't a game here, you earn it and telling you defeats the whole purpose, you're over a thousand years old grownass man, figure it out yourself or die trying." I held out a hand and was grasped by a cold one and poofed away.

Betting on Thor returning to our home first to try and find Loki, I found myself outside one of my favorite shops of Salem where Loki appeared beside me with a smirk. "You were surprisingly stern with him. With all the A team these days in fact."

"They're all fucking kids and not just because I'm older than all but Thor, they'll think you're not serious if you're joking around. Exhausting bunch, I feel for you, think I'm getting a headache from glaring at them too long."

Loki grabbed my wrist before I could walk into the store and pulled me back to face him. "What you said about me back there..."

"I meant it obviously. This isn't news, I told you from the start I got your back, Jack. Or front, whatever side you want me on, I'm yours."

Loki was silent but cupped my face softly. "No one's stood up to Thor like that before though."

"He's a steel wall is why, no matter what angle you come at him, you ain't getting through. Was his father the same, I mean the dude supposedly traded his eye for wisdom."

"He claimed to be better and he did have some pearls of wisdom as you Midgardians would say but for the most part he was the original Thor. The man did have a murderous monster of a daughter after all which resulted in first locking her up and then the whole realm being destroyed, for all my misdeeds I can't hold a candle to that."

"Well I mean you have a world eating snake of a son according to your first mortal worshipers, wonder where you got that idea from," I teased.

"I'm taking all those mythology books away from you if you're going to keep using them against me," he warned.

"Over my living body, sweetcheeks, they're Norse gold. What was childbirth like? I'm told it's no hayday, betting you were quite horse after that ordeal too."

He glowered at me but pulled me closer against him and shut up my wickedly clever puns with a passionate kiss. "We'll see who's hoarse when I'm done with you."

"Promises promises. Should we really just leave him here to wander around, I feel like that's just another disaster waiting to happen letting him loose, there's leash laws for a reason."

"You know he once tried to insult me by calling me a witch for dressing in the darkest green suits I can conjure, this is before I knew what your witches are like of course, but still. Let's see how the locals take to his antics."

"They'll eat him alive, everything out of his mouth is either violence or insulting. He's Michael Bay in a muscle suit."

"Shall we watch from the shadows then?" he encouraged.

I grinned and let his magic cover me like an invisibility cloak before we found him easy enough wandering the cobblestone streets of downtown Salem.


	6. Can't Rain All the Time

It was beyond amusing watching Thor try to find his way around town, asking people if they've seen us, trying to make friends and being given weird looks in the process. He was essentially a big, excitable labraThor in Lokitty City, lucky if he didn't get his snoot scratched for sniffing around too much. This was a protected city and if you were welcomed enough you would be just as protected if you were a resident especially. The Wiccans loved him, his illusions and mastery of magic used during the month of October had been a massive hit, making Salem even more popular then which made any business owner in Salem immensely happy with all dem tourists coming in to see the show he presented. He was truly home here, praised for his gifts where in his birth-home he was shunned for it. I often wondered what his adoptive father would think if he saw him now, if he saw us now, the stolen child with a woman that had far too much in common with his first mistake of a child in a land of Midgard that celebrates, accepts, and encourages everything he hated about Loki. That moldy old bearded bastard was only so lucky I couldn't raise him from the dead just to gloat at him for giving Loki everything he could've but didn't as a father.

"You're doing that devilish expression again, either let me in on the mischief or tell me what dark thoughts dance in your mind," Loki murmured softly to me so Thor couldn't hear us while we spied on him.

"As a necromancer it's very rare for me not to respect the dead or else they'll never answer to my call...but there are a few exceptions I would really love to dance on someone's grave...provided I know where said grave is."

"Who's grave dare I ask?"

"Not naming any names but I'll give you a hint, it rhymes with Brodin."

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you're starting to despise him more than I do and you haven't even met him."

I shrugged lazily. "Between what you've told me, what's evident between how you and Thor were raised, and what Thor is like to this day, I don't really need to nor want to if that was ever possible. He's a cock-juggling thundercunt in my book, nuff said."

Loki snickered at my blatant insult. "You always have such colorful words for describing people."

"Yeah well, not everyone can make the worst of insults sound classy and smooth like you do with your accent, not everyone can afford a silver tongue either. Some of us have to settle for iron or mica." I stuck my tongue out for emphasis. "Will he eventually give up and go back to the compound or throw a temper tantrum first?"

Loki studied his brother silently for a moment. "You're more observant than I've given you credit for."

I smirked. "Drop people's expectations of you low enough and you'll surprise them more when you show your true colors."

Loki rested his chin on top of my head, holding me close against him from behind. "He's both stubborn and stupid, could go either way. Care to place a wager on which?"

I snorted underneath him. "Hard pass, every time I make bets with you I end up losing, learned my lesson spank you very much."

"Have you though?" he purred in my ear, causing me to shiver. "Have you really learned your lesson with me?"

"Depends on the lesson I suppose," I teased back.

It was then of course, Thor had spotted a passing cat familiar and attempted to pet it only to get his hand swatted at with claws out and a hiss and I had to swallow back the cackle bubbling in my throat at watching that, his expression of utter rejection was priceless. 

"Even the animals don't like him here, told you this would be our perfect place of peace," I mused.

"If that was a snake, he'd believe that was me," muttered Loki.

I sighed, remembering the time Loki had actually turned into a snake for me, I almost couldn't blame Thor for picking him up, the scales on that god were gorgeous though I shouldn't have been surprised, everything on him is perfection, scales, fur, armor, birthday suit. "Now I want a pet snake, but Lady Catalie might get jealous and eat it."

"I warned you flerkens weren't the best house pets."

"You didn't warn me, you just told me she wasn't a kitty and then once she took care of the dog problem there hasn't been any complaints about her aside from the occasional hairballs of bones she leaves for us."

"Another reason she should return to the smaller household pest diet," he noted. "Those are considered normal cat leftovers if we ever have guests over with her around."

I rolled my eyes but leaned back into his embrace all the same. "Since when is anything involving us considered normal, what's normal for the spider is madness to the fly." 

Loki hummed in agreement. "Thor is about to give up and pout in three, two, one."

I was thankful I didn't take the bet then, it was almost scary how easy Loki could predict Thor's actions as Thor did just that and went to mope on a nearby bench. Defeat was definitely not a good look on the god of easy wins. If I wasn't dead set on humbling the grumpy god into submission, I'd almost consider giving him a hug and a lollipop. "I am so glad I chose you as my favorite god, who in their right mind would want to kneel for this big baby?"

"People that don't get to see this side of him usually, all they usually see is him smashing their enemies into pieces and leading them to victory," Loki replied easily. "Let us leave him to his brooding, if he suspects we're near he won't learn his lesson."

I nodded in agreement. "What should we do till then?"

"I have a few ideas..."

"And after we use up those 15 minutes?"

"I have a few more ideas."

"You know if you're so adamant on having a threesome with me, all you have to do is ask me for a copy," Loki told me later.

"I've seen that in a movie once, I'm likely to find another copy of you working on some grand science experiment to stop the doomsday clock from hitting midnight and you claiming you were thinking of me the whole time," I countered.

"And of course you'll believe everything you see in movies," he scoffed. "Besides, that seems counterproductive with you being a key player in doomsday and all and me lying to your face like that would just set you off and speed it up."

"Valid point," I murmured. "Your move."

Loki narrowed his eyes at the tower of blocks between us, any sort of game of intelligence usually ended in him winning so games of physics seemed like a better option to pass the time leisurely. With one long almost dainty finger he gently nudged a block in the middle of the tower about halfway out when a bolt of thunder literally shook the house and the tower he was in the middle of picking apart with it. "Damn Thor and his bad timing."

"He's your brother, I'm counting that as a win for me."

"Adoptive," corrected Loki. "Though as he is unfortunately still family, I believe it's my turn to deal with him." He stood up as it began to rain outside and swiftly went to the door just before Thor was about to knock on it.

Thor stood outside as it pored down around him and looked absolutely heartbroken and I still had to swallow back a cackle because while he was every bit the appearance of a lost puppy left in a cardboard box for anyone to pick up for free, it was refreshing to see him like that rather than the proper Son of Odin I've always seen him as before. He stared at his brother for a long silent moment without coming in, a look of utter hopelessness in his eyes. 

"Noelle," Loki murmured to me without taking his eyes off Thor. "You may have broken him."

"I'm the embodiment of the end of all things, what did you expect?" I asked in turn. "Just let him in before he floods the place, this is witch city, the locals aren't terribly fond of that much water."

Loki chuckled and returned his full attention to his brother. "Would you like to come in perhaps?" he drawled.

Thor blinked and gave Loki a watery smile before nodding. "Thank you, brother."

While I had set things in motion between them, it was ultimately not my place to go any further so I busied myself with making them both coffee, knowing Thor wasn't one for a nice cup of tea like Loki was. 

"Are you happy here, brother?" asked Thor softly.

"I wouldn't be living here if I wasn't," Loki answered boredly.

There was a long moment of silence between the two, most likely Thor struggling to find the words or put his feelings into words, another clash between him and Loki. Being both a master of self control and a wordsmith gave the green god a talent for making his thoughts, feelings, and intentions clear if he needed to. Unless of course someone or something was forcing his mouth shut. I sighed in exasperation, gods or not, men were such a weird species on their own. I walked in, handed them both their drinks, and left, watching them work things out or not was less entertaining than watching professional golf. 

"Boy troubles?" a familiar voice greeted me when I entered the bedroom.

I arched my eyebrow at the question and the one asking it more specifically. "You're the leading cause of most of them."

"I'm a Chaotic, if I'm not the cause of it, it ain't really considered trouble," the higher being retorted. 

I rolled my eyes at him and collapsed on the bed. "Can't you do that somewhere millions of miles away from here, I got enough of that from the A team."

"Believe me, they're a problem for all of us but they have their own designs we can't really tamper with without making things ten times worse for our own designs. At least I got that Strange guy off your ass for a while, that was fun actually."

"I suppose I should thank you for that and giving Loki his stuff back."

"You should be doing more than thanking me," he teased.

I threw a pillow at him in annoyance. "You had your chance, you want some of this, take it up with the warden downstairs dressed in green and gold."

"He still not giving the green light in a threesome I take it."

"Only if its two Loki's, one me."

"Go green or go home then. Funny, I kind of recall something like that happening but the guy was blue then."

"One of my least favorite colors," I noted. "You won't catch me dead or deader in yellow and black spandex either."

Cro looked me over curiously. "Finally accepting your inner goth?" he teased at my almost entirely black attire.

"Got tired of every other color being stained in blood for some reason or another actually."

"Stop bleeding so much then."

I glared at him though he had a point. "I'm a woman, that's kinda my thing."

"Please, you can't even remember the last time that was an actual reason to bleed," he countered.

"Well I mean that was the deal, to not remember the past in favor of the present and future, you can't blame me for that."

He threw the pillow back at me which I promptly caught and snuggled into happily. "No regerts then?" he joked.

"I'm not having that tattooed anywhere but otherwise yeah, no takebacks."

"That's my horsegirl."

"That's horsewoman, I'm legal for all woman things including life insurance if I was in fact alive."

"Or had anyone that could use that when you aren't," he mused. "Kinda don't see Loki cashing in on that, being immortal himself and all."

"Doesn't need the empty bank account and dust bunnies to my name to live like the king he is. Speaking of kings, what the hell is taking them so long to hash it out, is it a guy thing? It shouldn't be this much of a hassle if they are in fact family."

"In all fairness, this has been an issue between them for literally over a thousand years so that's like a fuckton of baggage to unload and pick through between polar opposites of siblings, one being clever and silent the other being slow and loud. Can you imagine having a sister that got all the hot boys in school, naturally perky and pretty and popular and not understanding why you weren't part of her clique till your badass leather wearing boyfriend stepped up and put her in her place for you?"

I blinked, imagining that entire scenario. "Did you just now come up with that analogy or has that been a longstanding fantasy I didn't know about?"

"Like you haven't imagined something like that."

"Not really considering I have absolutely nothing to go on from my past, I could've been the big tits dumb blond mean girl back in high school or the loser with no friends for all I know."

Cro opened his mouth to counter my point but for once I actually had him there. "Touche."

I smirked smugly at him. "Don't suppose you could ban Vision and Wanda from bothering us too, could you?"

"Unfortunately, you're going to have to team up with them at some point again so best to keep them available so they can get that stick out of their ass long enough to settle differences."

I groaned and buried my face in the pillows, not wanting to deal with them again anytime at all. "Hard pass, check please."

"The price you pay for being rescued by one even though he stopped being one himself once he met you, sugartits."

"I want a refund."

"You made that impossible by feeding the cashiers to your army, remember. All sales are final. But hey, not all of them are impossible to be around, that little spandex wearing spider seems to love you and don't forget Sargent Shinysides."

"That's two out of how many and growing?"

Cro shrugged carelessly. "Show them what a badass boss you are when the time comes for it, when it does...you'll have full reign of that, I guarantee it. We didn't resurrect you just to hide in the shadows, we pulled you back out for so much more than that."

I grinned then, I wasn't just the end of all things during the end of days, I was a badass whenever the fuck I wanted to be. "I'm a mutherfuckin' Horsemen, to be in my way is to be trampled into dust."

"And behold, a pale horse and it's rider was Death, with hell following close behind her," Cro quoted. "Show them what happens when you don't knock on Death's door."


	7. From A to V

When I returned to the living room where I left the two space Vikings, I found Thor attempting and failing hilariously to befriend Lady Catalie who was content to rub against Loki's legs and dodge his outstretched hands trying to pet her. Loki of course had the most amused expression across his face, barely containing his laughter at how frustrated Thor was at once again failing something while in town. Loki sensed me returning and turned to wink at me, seeing me enjoying the show just as much as he was.

"Care to place a wager on how long before he gets clawed?" he teased.

"Once again, I learned my lesson betting against you."

Thor grumbled in his throat and temporarily gave up in seeing me return. "Why doesn't your cat like me, Loki? Is this your doing?"

"She's more Nell's cat than mine as she met Nell first. It also might be because she knows you're a dog person too," Loki replied in a playful tone.

"And she eats dogs for breakfast and dinner," I added. Lady Catalie hearing my voice, bolted from Loki to my legs and I scooped her up and kissed her fuzzy little head affectionately. "Henchmen for lunch." Lady mewed in agreement and headbutted me back.

Thor watched me cuddle the fuzz out of my favored pet and couldn't help but smile at the image of a leader of corpses going all mushy for the tentacled fuzzball. "Does she know that's a flerken?" he murmured to Loki.

"Earth cats don't eat dogs, Thor, dogs eat them first, so yes, she knows and still spoils it rotten."

I glared at Loki while murmuring praises to Lady for being the bestest guard kitty ever, eating all the hellhounds and henchmen that tried to ruin my house and day. "At least if we're ever called away from home for whatever reason, we don't need to have a catsitter watching her while we're gone, she'll feed herself just fine."

"She'd probably eat the cat sitter anyway," noted Loki. "I'm not looking forward to cleaning up that hairball."

I snickered at this. "Are you two done with your family squabble?"

"I have a lot to make up for," Thor spoke first. "And I shall endeavor to make it up to you as much as I can. I will also talk to Tony about the dangers the stones possess and as such being in possession of one though I don't know what to do about Vision's. I tried to destroy one of them myself some years back and the only thing that resulted from my attempt was pissing it and its wielder off. We might actually need your kind of power, both Loki's and yours, to dispose of them properly."

I glanced at Loki uncertainly and saw his stiff expression as assurance that might actually be the case, he looked about as thrilled at the idea of getting close to one as I felt. "Put us down as a last resort then."

"Of course, I understand. Thank you, Nell, for your hospitality and council while I've been here, I should like to see more of my future sister-in-law when possible."

"Stop bringing all your teammates into the equation and that might be doable," I told him smoothly.

"Not even young Parker?"

"He's an exception but the only one, mind you."

Thor nodded in understanding but grinned goodheartedly. "I shall keep that in mind, till next time my friends."

We watched him leave the house where the rain then stopped as he stepped out and in a shower of thunder and lightning, he took off again into the skies.

"Think it'll work?" Loki asked incredulously.

"It'll take a miracle," I replied doubtfully as well.

"Pros and cons of the A team," I listed off later on a whiteboard Loki had graciously provided for sheer amusement.

"Thor is definitely on the pros," Loki told me.

I scribbled a lightning bolt in red marker on the pro side in agreement. "Yeah what's up with him dropping the sister in law bomb?"

"He wanted to know how serious we were in our relationship, as he had already asked me to be completely honest with him, I told him the truth that I wanted you to be my queen and if that wasn't feasible to rule with you by my side then you as my wife will have to do."

"Awww, well ain't that just sweet and romantic of you, under all that golden and leather armor there's a soft squishy center just waiting to pour out."

His response was throwing a decorative couch pillow at me because why else would you call them a throw pill if not for their intended purpose. "Tell anyone of that little secret and they'll never find your body."

"Again with the death threats? Forgotten I'm already dead, you silly necrophiliac? If you're gonna threaten me, do it properly."

"Who said anything about killing you, I'd just bind you up and bury you deep and then bury a dead animal on top so even the corpse sniffing dogs won't be able to tell you're under there."

I arched an eyebrow at his theoretical threat. "That's a bit specific and accurate on hiding bodies, there something you wanna share with the class?"

Loki smirked at me wickedly. "Not at the moment. Add Parker to the pros as well, he's practically foaming at the mouth to visit during the holiday season."

I eyed him warily before drawing a spider on the pro side by which I mean a ball with eight legs coming out of it. "Musn't forget the cons of course: Wanda definitely." I drew a red hurricane symbol under cons. "Do we know about Vision? He follows her lead but he did seem at least a little ashamed of his actions here."

"Whatever he feels about us does not matter in the end, he wields an infinity stone like a damned tiara. He's a danger to everyone around him."

I nodded in agreement and drew a large V with a little stone where the inside of the letter is deepest.

"Something on your mind, love?" he teased, instantly seeing the very much intentional way it was drawn out to look like something else.

"Whatever do you mean?" I asked back in the most innocent voice I could muster. "Tony seems to be on our side even after we banned him from our holiday parties, that's taking it like a champ as our parties are the bees knees." I attempted to draw his arc reactor under the pros.

"Dr. Strange is a definite con start to finish, even if he's out of the equation."

I paused in thought before deciding on drawing an hourglass under cons. "So the pattern here is magic wielders are a no, everyone else is either a maybe or yes, is that right? Is Captain Underpants in the equation or should we not worry about him just yet?"

"I think he might fall under the small gray area, the man is all about second chances but between my invasion causing hundreds of lives lost and you not being remotely merciful in the battlefield, not that you should be, he might not want us to have another chance."

"I dunno, his super secret assassin boyfriend is kinda like the slightly less attractive Midgardian version of you from what Peter told me. Long dark hair, forced out of his right mind into mass murders by an evil bunch of bad guys, kinda hot, kinda badass but absolutely lethal even when he's stable."

"That sounds like I have to kill him then if you're so fond of him and there can only be one of me in any plane of existence."

"I'm fairly certain you offered at least two of you to me at some point."

He narrowed his eyes at me and sighed in exasperation. "If you're going to use that against me then it's no longer on the table."

"I mean, we don't have to do it on the table anyway, any smooth or comfy surface will do."

"Is sex all you think about?" he teased.

"Do you want the truth or what you want to hear?" I retorted with a wide smirk.

"How are you so sure that's not one in the same?"

I shrugged innocently and gave him a playful wink. "Woman's intuition? Have we listed all the Avengers? I feel like we're missing...a bunch."

"Who knows, they're always adding more into the fray."

I snorted at this. "They're probably handing out applications everywhere. Wanna save the world? Sign your name in blood and tell us your measurements so we can fit you with your very own super suit, hiring based on experience and beliefs, positions filling fast, inquire within."

"You're not wrong, they literally pulled you out of the den and into their employment."

"They didn't employ me, I didn't get a dime out of my labor which is funny enough considered free labor and also quite illegal in this country at least. The department of labor will be on your ass faster than neckbeards on a Catwoman cosplayer."

"Seems like there's a department for everything in your country."

"I've yet to hear about a department of silly walks."

Loki gave me the most confused face yet. "Is that an actual issue in this country?"

"It is in England apparently, there's a whole ministry for it."

"The same country people that don't actually know who I am suspect I come from?"

"That's a compliment if that comment came from an American, we fucking love Brits despite their ancient history of trying to fuck us over with our recently acquired land here."

"I'm not entirely convinced of that, a great many of you Americans love to hear yourselves talk."

I snickered, that could probably be said for any person of power in this country, from the president to Tony himself to any white male politician and anyone involved in government decisions. "You talk loud enough then you become accustomed to only hearing your voice over the many that try to speak to you."

"Wise words from someone so young as yourself."

I gave him the once over and scoffed. "Dead women tell no tales, Oldie Hawn."


	8. Bug Life Chose Me

One would think after a few days of peace and quiet and hopefully smoothing things over with the head of the group that butted into one's afterlife quite rudely, things would have settled down and we could all move on with our lives. Loki predicted this wouldn't be the end but as to the reasons why we'd be getting more visitors, he was a bit apprehensive about. Something about a chain reaction from getting his full powers back setting things in motion. It all sounded ominous especially coming from him. He said if one stone wielder could hunt us, whoever else that had the stones could as well, the question though was if they already had the stones, why would they need to. Neither Loki nor I had anything to do with them, sure Loki at one point tried to hold onto the Tesseract but part of the deal he made to stay on this planet was to give that up to the Avengers, kinda like his rent for living here. Of course they tried to get him to give up other such powerful weapons but you really can't strip search a god that puts everything in a pocket dimension only he has access to. You also can't get that many layers off him without taking him out to dinner first, he's a classy god.

Loki sat up right suddenly in the middle of the night and was out of bed swiftly and shifting into his battle gear before I could blink the sleep I was pulled from out of my eyes. He went to the window but didn't stand in front of it but just to one side while glancing out and then looking to me as I watched him curiously.

"Should I get my clothes on for this?" I asked groggily.

"As much as it pains me to say this, that would be wise. If you can grab them without any sudden movements or looking like you're about to start something in the process, that would be key."

I nodded slowly and slid under the covers completely then rolled to the side of the bed my clothes were closest to and tumbled off, softly landing on my hands and toes and scrambled for my clothes, hastily pulling them on before sliding under the bed and waiting for Loki to make the first move if any were needed. "Ready when you are. Where are they?"

"One's hidden in a tree with a weapon trained on the window, I'm sifting out if there's others. Half expecting to be Clint but then he has his little farm in forced retirement. It appears to be Romanov and another."

"Another what?"

"Avenger I don't actually think I've met. Think I might have to introduce myself to them, if you can handle Widow, I've got the other."

I smirked. "Where is she, in the tree?" Loki simply nodded and I sighed and sent two zombies to shake her out, one to get her off the tree, one to grab her feet when she landed.

"What's an ant's natural enemy?" Loki asked me.

"According to you, a boot, why?"

He gave me a disapproving look for that answer. "I'm not creating a giant boot to the other avenger, that would look ridiculous."

I snorted. "And nothing else you do is over the top, Mr. Fancypants?"

"Nell," he warned in a light tone.

"They're insects, pretty much anything bigger than them is a natural enemy including bigger ants."

"Oh you're no help," he muttered though the corners of his lips twitched as he fought off a smile.

I crawled on my stomach to the other side of the window before standing up and glancing out it, seeing my zombies keep Widow busy. A woodpecker then swooped out of the sky and landed on the grass some feet away from Widow, pecking at the ground with its long sharp beak before suddenly being startled off by a dude in red and metal pop out of nowhere shooing the bird away. The man then suddenly started to grow bigger and flicked the zombies already above ground off Widow which prompted me to just keep them below and grab from above.

"And here I thought you were the freakishly tall one," I muttered, earning another unamused look from Loki. "Don't think there's a zombie big enough for that one, you're up." I watched the giant offer his hand to Widow who hopped onto it and was elevated up to the window's level again.

"His belt is how he controls his size, if I could get a clear shot at that..." Loki drifted off.

"You're both clearly home, come out, we just want to talk!" called Widow from the outside.

I snorted at this. "Is that why you had a weapon trained on us through the window? To talk?!"

"Well you did attack two of our team members!"

"We defended ourselves when they attacked us first, Romanov. No one here is innocent, you should know that better than anyone," Loki sneered.

"If I'm bitten by one of those zombies, do I become a zombie too?" the giant asked innocently.

"Not how it works but you're welcome to join the black parade," I replied. "Of course you have to die first but that can easily be fixed."

"Thor was there when they blew off our door, he can attest to my statement, stop bothering us, we left the tower for a reason," Loki barked. 

"Well maybe we should've kept you both there longer," Widow replied.

"No takebacks, all sales final!" I spoke up. "Don't yall have bigger badder villains to chase after, we haven't done anything we weren't within our rights to do."

"We want to know what you two are up to that there was suddenly a massive power flux right where you live and Wanda wants you dead after just meeting you," Widow demanded.

"She was being one hundred percent that bitch after we called her out to Thor for not knocking first, got caught with her hand in the cookie jar and blamed the tattletale for it."

"And the power surge?"

"It seems your local mystic wasn't being truthful when he gave me use of my powers again, he kept some for himself. What those two felt and what you saw on your electronic charts was me getting the full amount i was owed back and mixing it with Nell's," Loki replied in a clipped tone.

"Dr. Strange? Tony's magical doppelganger?" asked the giant. "I'm putting you down, my arm's getting tired and I can't stay big for long." The giant put Widow down and hit a setting on his belt like Loki had predicted that shrunk him down to what had to be his actual size without the belt.

We watched the dude in the suit take off his helmet with a sigh of relief and then disappear around the house and a knock on the door soon followed which I happily went downstairs to answer myself. "Hello, if you promise not to attack, you're welcome to come inside." The man smiled and offered me his hand. "Scott Lang, scout's honor I won't."

I shook it and let him in. "I'm Nell, I'm sure you already know of Loki." 

Scott looked around in general awe of the cottage full of antiques and Asgardian stuffs. "This place is amazing, so elegant and regal, should be in a mansion."

"We thought that would be a bit much if not an eyesore and we don't want to stick out to the naked eye," Loki stated, suddenly behind me. 

"Is Widow coming in?" I asked him curiously.

"She's keeping surveillance on the house from outside but I have eyes on her just as much in case she decides to join us in her own way," Loki assured me.

"So you're here because Wanda threw a fit about being kicked out of here? Really? I already got an angry call from Tony about reprimanding one of his many kids," I stated to Scott.

Scott chuckled. "The team just wants to be sure you're on their side still after kicking her and Vision's ass."

"We're on our side, both of us didn't really have a choice when we first met and was housed by them, the only reason we helped each other then was because we both hate Hydra."

"But if push came to shove?"

"It depends on the enemy," Loki replied smoothly. "This Ultron I've heard of for instance, that's entirely Tony's fault as I see it, he created the creature so he should take care of the mess it made and shut it down. If it's something concerning more than just the team perhaps, then I might be inclined to help but we are not mages for hire that come whenever you think you might need extra help."

"Even if it concerns the stones?" asked Scott curiously.

"We already told them our vote on them, what more do they want?"

"Help in defending and understanding them maybe."

Loki scoffed and rolled his eyes. "The only thing they need to understand is that the longer you hold onto them the closer they are to their and this world's destruction, there are beings out there constantly searching, constantly hunting them down and when they find them here...you'll all wish you heeded my words on destroying the stones sooner."

"Then tell us how to prepare for these things?"

"You can't." Loki's voice went flat and stiff. "When they come...the invasion I helped lead in New York will look like a slap on the hand compared to what the others will bring. You're wasting your time and effort trying to pick fights with us when there's far worse coming your way than two ex team members trying to stay out of it."

"Then help us destroy the stones so that doesn't happen."

"Get the time stone from the mystic then, otherwise the ones after the stone can just use that to reverse us destroying the stones and it would all have been for naught."

I glanced over at Loki with an arched eyebrow curiously, the god knew his shit, that much I figured from the start but the fact that he could predict this bad guy's moves had me both worried and curious. I'd have to ask him about that later. 

"Would you help us though, in the end? Even if we did as you suggested and attempted to destroy the stones and they still came, these things that are hunting them?" asked Scott.

"We might," Loki muttered softly.

"If there's a reward involved...and you asked really nicely," I added. "And you stop bugging us, we'll use the spray next time you try that."


	9. Witch, I Said Yes!

Something was coming, that much I figured out with the multiple A team visits, Loki's apprehensive attitude, especially about the stones, and Cro's random ass visit as well, he never showed up unless there was a damn good reason and a little pep talk wasn't a reason at all. It was a warning, I had to be ready and I would be at full power when it came whatever it was. I worried about Loki though, his usual calm if not lazy demeanor was gone when he wasn't shagging my brains out. Ever since Scott came to us, he would take time out of the day to practice and build up his magical and otherwise arsenal. He was preparing for whatever was coming but even with his newly restored magic, he still came off as deeply worried if not fearful of what was coming. If an ancient god that had seen Hel and all its horrors was stressed out, that stressed me out in turn and I can't deal with stress, that was strictly for the living.

I walked over to him while he was sharpening one of his many blades, took his hand, kissed it, and then put a small pocket flashlight in his palm. "I sense dark times ahead, you'll need this."

He studied the flashlight briefly, turning it on, then gave me yet another unamused look. "You feel it too then."

I shrugged. "More just an observation from recent events, whatever happens though...I got your back, Jack."

Loki dimensionally pocketed the flashlight all the same and returned to sharpening his blade. "I know you do, just as I have yours. It has me thinking though, you've been by my side since we met and although it's been a short time since, it feels like much longer."

"If you're about to say what I think you are, this better not be because you think this is the end of us and everything and you don't want to die single."

"I'm asking you this because there might not be another opportunity, because our lives are often suddenly and rudely interrupted by obstacles we can't keep ignoring." The knife disappeared and was replaced by an ornate gold ring with small emeralds surrounding a single black diamond at the center.

"If I say yes and end up outliving you, I'm gonna be super pissed you made me a widow, we already have one on the A team."

"Then I shall endeavor not to die first, would that suit you?"

"How about you don't die at all and I'll consider it."

"That's your answer? You'll consider it?" he asked incredulously.

I tore my eyes off the ring to look into his eyes for a moment. "If things weren't about to get darker, would you still ask me?"

"Dark or light, I still want you as my wife."

"Not just pretty words?"

"If I recall correctly you once said everything I do is pretty by nature."

I scowled at him using my own words against me. "Stupid clever god. Yes, give me the damned ring, you cotton headed ninny muggins. But we're having the ceremony and all after the shitstorm comes."

"Of course, my love," he purred while slipping the ring onto my bony ass hand and kissing the top of it. "It will be like the days of old, toasting to a long and happy life together with the skulls of our enemies."

"Now that's what I'm talking about, it'll be something old and something borrowed for tradition's sake."

"Oh many traditions will take part in that, I'll make sure of it." He pulled me against him with the hand he just claimed and claimed my lips with his as well.

"Who's going to give me away at the wedding though?" I wondered once I pulled away to give him oxygen. "I mean there's Cro but he only pops up when he wants and he'd probably steal me away before giving me away. What about Thor?"

"I was going to have him be my flower girl and best man at the same time, should be entertaining seeing him juggle both responsibilties. Did you know he's also the god of fertility?"

"I found that myth harder to believe than you spawning a snake, a horse, and a wolf, fertility gods are always female in their pantheons."

"I think you'll find Asgardians are not your average immortals, I'm sure you can already attest to that."

I pretended to think it over and shrug innocently. "I've not met a lot of other immortals to compare you to, hardly seems fair."

"Life's not fair," he countered smoothly.

"Good thing I'm not full of life then, exception to that rule methinks."

"Wicked woman."

"Cuz I'm wicked awesome. You know once we get hitched, I'll actually have a last name on record, like I can't even hyphenate it to show my inner feminism, I'll just be Odinson...wait is it Odinson or Laufeyson?"

"You know we don't have to follow your country's marriage laws to the T, you're still legally dead and I'm still legally and literally an alien to this planet so we don't even need the whole giving of surnames if you really don't want to."

"That's a lot to consider."

"Not getting doubts already are you?"

"Doubt it." I snickered at his halfassed scowl, the god was far too used to my antics to appreciate them anymore. "I'm worried I'll lose this ring in the oncoming storm though."

"I took precautionary measures for that, it's bonded to you and only you, no matter what you do or what you become, only you can take it off if you wanted to, even if your finger's been severed from your hand, it will reappear on another finger. Also it will tell me if you ever need me and where you are when you do."

"You big gold romantic, your soft squishy center is showing again," I teased.

"No one will believe you," he countered with a smirk.

"Thor would, he already knows you wanted this."

Loki scoffed at this. "He takes everything I say with a grain of salt and everything else goes in one ear and out the other with him. You might be able to get Tony to give you away to me if you so choose. He loves being the father figure."

"Yeah to actual kids, not to dead women that are actually much older than him." I studied the ring on my finger adoringly. "Hope this goes with my battlewear."

"Do you even have that?" he asked doubtfully. "You only ever fight in casual wear."

"Well I'm certainly not going out in an evening gown and pearl necklace, you ever tried to kick ass in a dress, it's very constricting."

"But you look so stunning in those, you'd knock the breath from any soldier with eyes and have them on their knees like a queen."

Both eyebrows shot up at that statement, silver tongued or not, he was smoother than freshly woven silk on a baby's butt. "Smooth as fuck, but those kinds of clothes are especially hard to get blood stains out of without ruining the whole thing."

"We'll just make it all black then, that way no one will notice the difference."

"Who said it was my blood staining it?"

"Black hides all colors, red included, love."

I rolled my eyes at him but hugged him tightly to me. "Whatever comes our way, we're in it together, not even death will part us."

"I have survived worse, nothing will keep me from you now," he assured me. He pulled away just to cup the side of my face in one hand and studied me with glimmering eyes. "The A team has no idea what's coming for them."

"What are you thinking?" I asked curiously.

"They've been paying us random visits, as much as it pains me to say this, why don't we repay the favor. At the very least, it will draw any unwanted attention away from our home and its more innocent residents."

I mulled it over for a moment before nodding. "Fuck New York minus Peter."

"Get what you need, we're going on a portal trip."

"There will be cake."


	10. Please Hold, Your Call is Important

We walked into the compound heads high and with glorious purpose and made a quick beeline to the receptionists desk, aware but uncaring of the eyes of the occupants of the lobby on us.

"I want to speak to your manager," I told the woman behind the desk firmly and fighting back a smirk for all the times I heard that phrase in any given retail store.

The receptionist looked from me, a white haired white chick that just happened to dress a bit gothy due to the unhealthy habit of bleeding black blood a little too easily for someone that's immortal and dead at the same time, to Loki who needed no introductions as he made his own first impression years earlier on the news destroying a craptastic city under someone else's control. "He's very busy, can I ask who's asking for him?"

Loki spoke up then, stepping in front of me to intimidate the woman. "You know who I am, he knows who I am, I'm sure you know exactly who is asking for him, so let's not waste any time stalling for backup, shall we?"

The woman opened her mouth to argue but no sound came out and she nodded slowly and picked up the desk phone. "Mr. Stark, there's a zombie and a demi god asking for you in the lobby."

"Long white hair, dresses in casual black attire for the zombie?" I could hear from the other end. "Milky eyes?"

"Exactly."

"I'll be right down."

"I should take you shopping with me more," I mused to Loki. "You always get the best results."

"Of course, love, I am a god after all," he purred.

A few minutes later, Tony appeared from an elevator with his own trademark smirk and opened his arms in welcome. "To what do I owe this visit?"

"All the visits we've been getting from your band of merry misfits," I replied lazily.

Tony pretended to look offended, holding a hand to his heart. "I would never allow such a thing, come on, we can talk in one of my offices before the press gets news of you two." He led us back into the elevator and up some levels before leading us to what looked more like a man's den than an actual official office but I didn't complain as I loved leather furniture. I took a seat on a large leather chair, spinning around in it for funsies before it was stopped by Loki who stood beside and was trying to hide a smile at my childish antics.

"So the power flux came from you two, that much has been cleared away," Tony began, taking a seat across from me. "What concerns me now is that warning you've been giving my messengers, it sounds like you know something we don't and I want to hear it first."

"It's the Infinity Stones you need to worry about, Thor was charged with finding the rest of them before our home was destroyed but he had failed miserably in doing so which could only mean the one that should never have any of them has them in his grasp already."

"And who is that exactly? Or should I ask what is that?"

Loki was silent for a moment and I glanced up at him worriedly as he looked like he was still battling demons for a moment longer. "The one that made me attack your realm the first time, that gave me the Chitauri scepter and tasked me with finding the Tesseract for him. He's the one that found me when I fell from the Bifrost and tortured me into submission to do his bidding, he's been after the stones since the first one was found if not longer."

"What happens if he gets all the stones?"

"He'll wipe off half the universe with the snap of his fingers, he thinks it will bring true balance to the universe."

"And you think destroying the stones first is the best option?" Tony asked with a tone of disbelief.

"Using them will only be a beacon for him to find you faster, even if you manage to use them to get rid of him, there are always others worse after them as well as his followers."

"You know I didn't want to believe it when Thor said you suggest we destroy the stones, you're always looking for objects of power to better yourself. But to hear it straight from the horse's mouth..." he chuckled at his own joke. "You must be serious about this."

"He's Loki actually, if you're looking for Sirius you'll need the resurrection stone which is lost in the Forbidden Forest somewhere still," I chirped.

Tony smirked at the reference but carried on. "We'll need to find a way to get the mind stone off Vision without killing him too."

"Must we?" I asked innocently.

Tony gave me a disapproving father look. "He's part of the team too, you know."

"Didn't see him on any of the missions I was on with you lot."

"He was off on his own before we found you, came back after you left, same with Wanda."

"Package deal then, those two," I muttered.

"Aren't you and Loki the same?" Tony challenged.

We looked at each other, Loki and I, and both shrugged. 

"Also should I congratulate you on the engagement? I mean, you more specifically, marrying a god while he's just marrying a zombie, hardly seems like an perfect match there."

I grinned as I hadn't taken off the ring yet since I had been asked. "I feel like you're trying to insult us but he's the one that asked and he knows exactly what he was asking for."

"Nice try, Stark," Loki stated as well. "But thank you all the same."

"Am I invited to the wedding?" Tony asked hopefully.

"If we're all standing by the time it's planned, maybe."

That seemed to sober up Tony a little bit, if that was possible. "You think even if we manage to destroy the stones, he'll still come, this harbinger of doom?"

Loki just nodded stiffly. "He'll make my invasion look like child's play."

"Is that why you gave up the tesseract?"

"I gave it up so I could move about this realm more freely and in doing so move away from the destruction it would bring to its owner. I would suggest going after the time stone first though in order of which should be destroyed and focused on."

Tony snorted at this suggestion. "You think I haven't already tried at least testing that? You met the guy, he'd send me back to the stone age before I can even get close to it."

"Then send someone able to withstand if not outmatch his magic."

"Like you?"

"If you want him dead, sure," I piped up. "He's been a pain in the ass since I met him on our first mission for no reason other than the same reason Wanda and Vision invaded our home, he got a bad feeling from us. If we go there, not only will he not survive, he'll die being right all along, which won't sit well with me."

"You really hate him, don't you?"

"At least you call us before powering up, he just popped up whenever it was convenient for him alone like the fucking Spanish Inquisition and no one expects the Inquisition."

"So what are you suggesting then if you know I don't want bloodshed involved?" asked Tony dryly.

"You're supposedly a genius, I'm sure you've already figured it out."

"You want me to pit one stone wielder against another?"

"Fight fire with fire," I agreed. "Plus it keeps them busy and away from us."

"So they're clearly not invited to the wedding then," Tony mused.

"Peter is," I piped up. "Provided he's not being a complete dork and taking pics of everything and everyone else."

"Good luck telling him no on all that, I doubt even someone dead inside can resist his sad puppy look."

"That's the only look that kid knows," I pointed out.

"Oh believe me, I'm aware, you've no idea how hard it was to take away his first suit I made him when he fucked up on my watch the first time. I felt like the world's worst father figure looking at him. But with prolonged exposure I was able to build up an immunity to it, something I doubt you got just from a weekend or two with the kid so yeah, good luck to ya."

I scowled at this and looked up at Loki who still stood beside me silently. "You tell him to tone it down."

"While I may be more immune to it with Thor being a bearded baby dog himself and having to live with that over a thousand years, I have grown quite fond of the Spiderling and not having him be himself in full is your idea, not mine," Loki replied. "You're on your own on this one, love."

"What happened to being in this together?" I squeaked. I pouted, crossing my arms over my chest. "Thought you only stab Thor in the back."

"Would hate to ruin such a glorious front that you have," Loki quipped.

My response was a poorly aimed elbow jab that only resulted in hitting my funny bone, my entire arm going tingly and numb at the same time from hitting his armor instead.

"Mrs. Nell Odinson," teased Tony. "Dunno if it has the right ring to it."

"What's wrong with the ring?" I demanded, admiring the stones on mine. "It fits me perfectly. And he likes it so he put a ring on it."

"As long as you're both happy, that's all that matters I suppose. Can I host the wedding too?" asked Tony like a little kid.

"Hard pass, with you comes the unwanted attention of the world and we're quiet folk, we like our solitude and shadows."

"You know it's always the quiet ones that are behind massacres."

"This isn't news, there's always a bunch of dead bodies following in my wake, perks of being a necromancer."

Tony grinned and was silent for a solid moment. "When Sauron comes, can we count on you two to defend the earth with us?"

I glanced up at Loki first for confirmation and was given another stiff nod. "You might have a Hulk but you'll need an army and I got one that doesn't stay down for long. As a child-star once said in one of my favorite Christmas movies, this is my home I have to defend it." I grasped Tony's outstretched hand in my own firmly. "Wildcats on three!"


	11. Be Prepared!

"Is this really necessary?" I asked Tony as I looked at myself in the mirror. "I didn't sign up for this."

"You're not going out against whatever we're fighting in a hoodie and sweatpants, if you're going out there with us, you're going out in style," Tony argued.

I snorted and did a few fighting moves and stretches in what I was peer pressured into wearing. "Suppose I should be grateful you didn't make me an iron suit like you did for Peter and Rhodes, metal ain't my style. Hoodies are always in style, they're what girls steal off their boyfriends the most."

"Because they're comfy and smell like the dude, not because they're fashionable," Tony retorted. "Why don't you like it?"

"Because it ain't my style?" I suppose it was better than my thoughts on Widow's first suit I've seen where it's pretty much just a super tight leather onesie without the feet. That looked so restricting no matter how hot it looked on her and how big it made her boobs. I never understood the need for super tight super suits, not only were they pretty much body condoms, they seemed a bit impractical, how were you supposed to hide your weapons and stuff in that? Utility belts? I know a certain mercenary preferred those and if you really loved steampunk that would work with the style it came with but outside of builders, neo-victorians, and cosplayers, that seemed a bit stupid. What happens if the enemy gets a hold of the belt, then what are you armed with? "What about a hoodie and jeans instead?"

"This isn't negotiable."

I scowled and tried to do squats in the outfit Tony provided. "When did you even make this?"

"Not important. I can design your wedding gown too if you wanted."

"Listen, Linda, you're lucky I'm considering even inviting you, why do you wanna get involved in that in the first place, you tried to stop us from pairing up which is ironic because you also tasked Loki with supervising me at the same time."

"I want to see how Asgardians get hitched and seeing as Thor is convinced he'll die single..."

"What about the ones those two shipped here from home when their own exploded?"

"None of the others even know who I am despite Thor's boasting of the team."

I rolled my eyes at his weak argument. "I might just not invite you at all if you're going to be a nag about it."

"I'll just crash it then."

"You realize Loki can conceal the whole thing anywhere on the planet, right?"

"I'll have someone on the inside tell me where then."

I groaned. "Stop being a pain in the ass or I'll ask Thor to ship us to some planet you can't find for it, I'm sure he'll understand. He'd do just about anything for his brother's happiness and Loki loves privacy more than I do."

"Tell me honestly though, what do you think of the suit?"

I looked at myself in the mirror from every possible angle I could see. "Mmm, oooh, yes...that's it, I'm not fighting!"

"What is the bloody hold up here, it should not take this long to dress her!" a familiar voice barked outside the room I was pretty much locked in thanks to Tony.

"How would you know? You've only ever undressed me," I joked back.

"Don't tempt me."

"Don't tell me what to do!"

Loki then apparated into the room, opened his mouth to retaliate but actually saw me in my Stark-made super suit and couldn't quite put enough words together to form a thought out loud. Then he turned to Tony with a scowl. "I leave you alone with her for a moment and you've turned her into this? She came here to fight not to seduce the enemy! No offense, love, it does make you look absolutely delicious in any other setting but the one we're headed straight into rather soon."

"As long as I don't look like a cheap thrill or gothic hoe," I replied.

"She's better off in a hoodie and jeans at this rate," Loki stated to Tony.

"Ha! Fucking told you so!"

"I let you two back into my home after you up and vanished and denied me into your parties everyone else was invited to and this is how you treat me," huffed Tony. "I don't have to take this, I will be in my office."

We watched him pretend to throw a tantrum and pretend to storm out of the room before returning our attention to each other.

"I might insist on keeping that outfit for other purposes though," Loki stated and snapped a finger, my suit vanishing and replaced by a super suit of his own designs. "What do you think now?"

I looked away from him for a moment to look at myself one more time and grinned. "Was half expecting you to either leave me in my birthday suit or revisit that tacky picture that I showed you of a lady necromancer in google images."

"Don't tempt me," he repeated.

"Don't tell me how to live my afterlife," I retorted. "This I like though, I can kick ass and look like a badass queen at the same time with ease in this. An illusion?"

"It's as real as you are, I assure you." He closed the distance between us and tapped my forehead lightly with a finger. "All you have to do now is think of it and it will return to you."

"You know that's dangerous, tampering with my head, look what it did to Scarlet Beaver."

"Except I'm not reading it, just putting a suggestion at the entrance for you to open. Not intrusive or invasive in the least. What's that Midgardian phrase? Ye of little faith, isn't it?"

I scowled at his grasp of our lingo and using it against me. "Only we can say that."

Loki smirked though it didn't quite reach his eyes as it usually did and that had me worried again.

"What's wrong?"

"The team is split, remember the men from your government that tried to get us on their side not too long ago? They're the cause of it. We need all of the team together and more if we are to beat what's coming."

"How the fuck do you know more about the team than I do?"

"Because my brother doesn't know how to shut up about anything," Loki replied dryly.

"So who's here and who's been voted off the island?"

"Rogers, his sidekick Barnes, Wanda funny enough, the mechanical birdboy Falcon, Widow, that giant Antman, might be others but they don't matter as much. We need as many as we can find though, this city had but a taste of what's to come."

"You don't think we'll survive it?"

"We won't, we need so much more."

I chewed my lip in thought. "Even with my army?"

"They'll be good against the Chitauri, maybe even the children of the leader but the leader himself, I'm not convinced."

"What should we do then?"

"I don't know, I might have to ask my brother on that matter." With no other warning, he pulled me into a quick kiss and poofed away in a flair of green.

I wandered the compound curiously to see if anything changed since my last stay here. The more rooms of pure tech I found the more I missed my home in Salem where everything had a history, a past, even the inanimate things that made up my house. I wondered if Skynet would start with Stark Industries, how would Tony deal with all his tech turning on him, I mean yeah he's a genius and hopefully learned his lesson after Ultron but there's still that chance, that glitch in the matrix where even with all his knowledge and money there's something he didn't anticipate with his tech. 

"So you're Nell?" a new voice asked from behind me as I was trying to figure out what the fuck I was even looking at in the world of technology.

I turned around to be face to face with a tall dude with buggy eyes and mechanized legs. "Ello, Tiny Tim, and what do you want for Christmas?"

"Really? That's where you wanna start? With the handicapped jokes?" he asked me incredulously.

I shrugged, no heartbeat no filter and a very broken moral compass which should go without saying when it comes to any necromancer and their knack for playing with dead things. "I mean there's so many worse jokes I could go with and seeing as you're miraculously still standing, it really wasn't that much of a low blow."

The man nodded his head with an expression that said "ok you got me there, not bad" but still didn't look remotely amused by me or my antics and gave me a scrutinizing look all the same. "Think you can just waltz in here with your golden green boyfriend that tried to kill us all?"

"I mean y'all let him in yourself way before I was in the equation and before he was on house arrest you pretty much gave him the key to this planet by fucking around with the tesseract so none of this shit's on me. Nice try though." I crossed my arms and gave the man a smug look of my own. "Check and mate, queen me."

"None of that was my doing," he tried to defend. "Tony calls the shots around here most of the time."

"And like a good little robo-dog you follow for tech treats and tummy rubs, the occasional upgrades. Has he taught you how to shake yet or just roll over?"

"Nah, isn't that what Loki's got you doing?"

I grinned widely. "Well he's the patron god of a lot of great positions, gotta pray to him somehow, right?"

The man blinked, clearly not expecting me to accept and shake off the jab if you could even call shacking up with a god of fun and pleasure a jab. "You're just a toy to him."

"I'm just a zombie, standing in front of a mortal, wondering if he has any brains." I got real close to him and pretended to sniff him as if one could tell what kind of brains someone had from scent alone. I then pretended to snap my teeth at him, making him jerk his head back away from me and taking a few steps back. I snickered and Thriller style zombie walked away from him. "My teeth and ambitions are bared!" I sang from an old Disney movie.


	12. Bless This Mess

Loki found me later during the evening attempting an arm wrestling match with Tony in one of his super suit and snapped his fingers, causing both Tony to lose control of his armor and breaking his concentration and allowing me to win easily.

"Cheater," grumbled Tony, retracting his armor.

"Stop stealing my woman from me," was Loki's only rebuttal.

At that, I got out of my seat and joined Loki's side as he offered me his arm like a gentleman and I easily latched on. He poofed us to another room I actually recognized as his own while he had been staying here before we decided to move elsewhere.

"What's up, Lopt?" I asked curiously.

"We're going on a trip, you, Thor, and myself. Between Thor and myself, we can find more support and I'm definitely not leaving you here with these mortals who will make everything worse and drag you into it like it's your job to clean up after them. Plus Thor wants to get to know you better, not sure why."

"We're leaving them now? What if these things come while we're off?" I asked. "What if the team can't handle them?"

Loki was silent for a long moment before closing the distance between us and cupping my face in his hands and looking at me deep in the eyes. "Then at least you and I will have a fighting chance. You asked me when we first met if I had to choose between the team and you, which would I choose and I gave you my answer then. That hasn't changed and the team stands for this planet so if it came to a planet that will never truly welcome me even though I've managed to find peace with one small town in it, I would still choose you. I have watched the first person, the first woman I ever loved slip through my fingers and I could do nothing to save her, I have watched my home realm be destroyed, burnt to its core and completely obliterated and could do nothing but watch it happen. Everything I ever loved up till you, has been destroyed and I could do nothing, so I'm doing something now, if I can't save your home then I'll settle for just saving you. You know I'm not a hero, that's not my nature, this is the best I can do and I'm only doing it for you."

"I don't need saving," I told him stubbornly.

"No? Then you had your ex and her demons under your control and weren't bleeding out while they crucified you with daggers in every vital organ?" he snarled.

"They were doing that to summon you, if you hadn't shown up, they'd have given up and I'd either be let go or they'd try to kill me, I'd still walk out in the end." I was suddenly pressed gently but firmly against the wall behind me by Loki who's eyes blazed and burned into mine.

"Do you have any idea how heartbreaking it is to see you as you were back there, covered in only your own blood, unable to stand on your own, and completely at the mercy of those bastards? Do you have any idea at all?"

I glared back at the hot headed Frost Giant and arched an eyebrow. "Yeah, like when Hydra locked you in a temperature controlled greenhouse and turned up the heat. You think I just tear people apart for funsies like I did back then? I might be dead inside but I still have a few living morals left. You don't get to play the victim here, I watched you wither in that glass case! For all your cleverness you seem to have forgotten you're still my weakness here, if something happened to you, the apocalypse comes early and your past tormentor is the least of this planet's problems." I shoved Loki away from me with strength and magic so he was now pressed against the wall behind him. "Don't talk to me about heartbreak or I'll rip yours out and eat it." I didn't let Loki get the last word after that, briskly walking out of the room and away from him.

It was Thor that found me first while I was literally ripping apart the training dummies the gym of the compound provided with my bare hands, the floor littered with pieces of them everywhere. Necromancy was awesome but sometimes it just felt better to get your hands really dirty...with the blood of your enemies. I had just torn off another dummy's head and threw it careless behind me but turned when the sound of it not hitting the ground was heard...or not heard? Thor stood where I had thrown it with the head in his hands, looking from it, to the mess I made, to me then back at the head.

"This isn't a good time to lose one's head," he joked lightly.

I snorted, despite Thor being 60% muscle, 30% lightning, and only sadly 10% intelligence, he had his moments. I stepped back from the hypothetical carnage and turned my attention to him fully. "Offering yours? Two heads are better than none."

"I like mine where it is, thank you. I'm going to go ahead and guess the reason there's bodyparts everywhere here is the same reason Loki has locked himself in a room not even Tony and Vision can get into."

I blinked, I knew Loki was a moodypants when he wanted to be but the god was a tiny bit of a diva and divas needed attention to survive. "Have you tried knocking first?"

Thor scowled at me and crossed his arms. "I've known my brother his whole life, I know how to reach him but I can't now."

"So you think I'm to blame?" I accused.

"I'm not blaming you, I simply wish to know if you know what's going on."

I scoffed and shrugged. "He's being a fucking douche-canoe is what's going on. Seems to think because I have a habit of being targeted and bloody a lot that I'm some delicate fucking flower that needs his protection despite being told otherwise a fuckton of times."

"He's afraid of losing you, can you really blame him when he's already lost so much and was helpless to stop that from happening before?" Thor tried to reason.

"Everyone's lost something or someone important to them," I growled. "But if either of us are to be lost, it's him, my fate was sealed before I was even born, I'm not going anywhere. Whatever he's afraid of that's got him having PTSD around the stones, is more likely to end him than me, they are his demons after all, mine don't come from space."

"How do you know what your fate is?"

"I was shown it," I replied flatly. "And I can tell you it ain't involving space invaders after the Flintstones Fruity pebbles."

Thor was quiet for a moment, letting everyone I said sink in. "Maybe it's not about that, there are many ways you can lose someone close to you, it doesn't have to be watching them die."

"Death is my specialty, hun, how else then?"

"The ones that found him after he fell from the Bifrost, they could've killed him themselves but instead they broke him then used him. It could be he fears that will befall you since you can't be killed or they'll go after him again and make sure he never sees you again."

Both eyebrows went up that time. "I'd say after enduring Hydra for five years, I'm not terribly worried about another longass round of torture but I don't actually know the full extent of what his demons are capable of and they could inflict it on either of us. I suppose you have a point there, where'd you learn that?"

"I think you'll find, I'm not just a piece of meat like everyone else thinks me to be."

I snickered. "You sure about that, all I'm seeing is manflesh with a nice smile."

"That's not saying much coming from a zombie," he teased. "Every being is food to you."

"You're just jealous I have a bigger appetite than you and most Asgardians."

"Just because we're not cannibals doesn't mean we can't out-eat you."

"Don't knock it till you try it. Also not being a cannibal means you can't even just eat me, let alone out-eat me."

"Loki's eaten you but he still prefers what's considered game over what's considered cannibalism."

"Well yeah, I mean we're two completely different species, even if he did actually eat me it wouldn't be considered cannibalism, you're really only proving you're just a piece of meat here."

"I'm more than just manflesh," he argued.

"I did say you had a nice smile, didn't I?" I teased. "I'll eat your face last, will that make you feel better?"

"You are in all aspects an insatiable woman, aren't you?"

I shrugged innocently. "You have no idea. The dead can't say no, remember."

Thor was quiet for a long moment, his scowl melting away to a more thoughtful look if that was possible for someone with only 10% smarts. "How long will you stay mad at my brother?"

"I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed," I muttered. "Asked me if I knew what a broken heart felt like. I wasn't born dead inside and even after death I've felt great loss and he fucking knows that, I've been open with him as much as I can be. It's his own fucking fault thinking I can't feel anything."

"That's what happened then?" Thor asked quietly.

"Swears to me he'd protect me if it meant sacrificing Midgard in the process, I told him of the two things to save, I'd bounce back quicker if he chose the other and he in turn accused me of not feeling loss. I then pointed out he's a fucking bonehead when I watched Hydra try to fry him to get to me. That's when I left because sometimes I just can't."

"I see, that actually sounds like something my brother would do, has done in the past quite a bit actually. I will try to talk to him again as while you might not believe it, I'm more than just muscle, I also have a heart."

"That's cute but the heart is also a muscle...points for trying though."

Thor should his head and headed out of the gym. "You two are perfect for each other."

"Should I put you down as the best man or the flower girl for our wedding?" I joked.

Thor spun around then with wide eager eyes. "Has he?"

I held up my hand to show the engagement ring. "Bitch, I said yes!"


	13. The Final Countdown

I didn't understand why while being probably the shortest person in the building I somehow got stuck being the bigger person here. Maybe it had something to do with the fact the actual biggest person not including Bruce Banner on his bad days could also be the biggest baby. You would think Thor was the biggest baby too with his history of tantrums during the rare times he's been told no by anyone especially his parents at one time. Both he and his brother were both over a thousand years old and still after all this time could result to being children that had been told they couldn't in fact have cookies before dinner. I could definitely understand Thor being this way but Loki should be used to not getting his way all the time given his history.

I stared at his door for a long moment wondering if I was going to go through this or not and how exactly I was going to approach Mr. Mopeypants exactly. "Loki, are you in there?" I knocked on the door to his room out of courtesy. "Thor wants to know if you can come out and play."

For a moment, there was nothing, no sound from the other side of the door and I wondered if he actually had left the building altogether but before I could ask Tony's AI if he was still present, there was the slightest of movements heard and that gave me some hope. "And what do you want?" came a pointed reply.

"You to put your big boy leather pants on and open the fucking door, you fucknut," I growled in annoyance. "I could easily blow it off its hinges if not but I'd rather not be like the other power fused residents of this place."

A faint scoff was heard before the door opened completely on its own, Loki on the farthest side of the room, a book in hand, sitting by the window. "You always have such a way with words."

I gave the god an unamused look as he glanced over at me from where he sat and strolled in with glorious purpose. "How old are you again?"

"Old enough to be your first ancestor and considered a pedophile," he replied dryly.

"Don't forget necrophiliac if we're going to list the taboo. Thor says you're being a moody little bitch and I don't want to be flying into the void with that so what's going on here?"

"What's going on?!" he snapped. "What's going on is that you throw yourself into danger the first chance you get with no regard of the effects it might have and not just on yourself."

"Don't pin this on me, hun. You act like I don't know what loss, what helplessness feels like because of my actions, of the two of us which is more likely to survive the worst case scenarios here? The bringer of the end of all things, or a fallen god that can't seem to catch a break or a rope to pull himself back up? Whatever's coming, whatever you're stressed about coming for the stones, that's your demon, your personal hell. I'm a Horsemen, I don't go through hell though, I raise it so whatever you're so worried about, it's not going to be the end of me but it could be for you so stop acting like I'm walking into a death trap here."

"You think that's all I'm concerned about? You dying at their hands? Your mentor all but assured me of two things, you can't die but you can break and as I'm still your only weakness, they could still use me to break you and I couldn't live with myself if that happened," Loki argued.

"It won't come to that," I told him slowly. "I won't let it."

"You don't know what they're capable of."

"Neither you nor them know what I'm capable of either," I stated darkly. "But maybe you both will by the end." I turned away from him to leave him to his broody reading but a cool hand grasped my arm and stopped me.

"Don't. Don't leave it like this." Not a demand, not pleading, but soft with a smallest trace of despair if you had the ears to pick up the inflections he so carefully tries to hide. "I can't lose the only thing worth fighting for now."

"What about your brother and your people here?"

"He can fight for himself and they have Heimdall and Brumhilda protecting them if not Thor as well. It's you that I fight for, it's always been you."

"Yet here you are fighting me instead. You can't have it both ways, fight beside me not against me, you won't win doing the latter."

Despite the seriousness of the situation, his lips twitched then. "You and I both know I can beat you in a fight."

"Whatever makes you sleep at night, sweety."

"Well you certainly help with that," Loki purred, pulling me back flush against him.

"You done being a moodypants?" I asked warily.

"I beg your pardon, a what?"

"You heard me, locking yourself away from everyone, brooding in a corner, all that's missing is terrible music blasting in the room about how life isn't fair," I teased.

"If you're comparing me to those adolescent Midgardians that cut themselves intentionally for attention and cover half their face in their hair..." he growled though there was no actual threat implied.

"If it whines like an emo and wears tight pants like an emo," I challenged.

"What was that style you're always compared to? Oh yes, a goth, wasn't it?" he sneered.

"That's not an insult, hun. Goths aren't after attention, they just like the aesthetics." I smirked at him in defiance.

We stared at each other for a solid moment before I was suddenly pressed against the closest wall behind me and his lips crashed onto mine hungry and demanding. Instead of simply disappearing our clothes like Loki usually did, he opted for the more traditional method of tearing mine off while I returned the favor tenfold. It was simple physics with us really, we needed each other and to be apart even emotionally was massively unhealthy though what does either immortal really know about health when one's already dead and one can only be killed to die.

I woke from my dead sleep in the middle of the night from Loki tossing and moaning in his sleep. I could tell right off it wasn't the fun kind of moaning either as he was drenched in sweat with a look of anguish etched into his sleeping flawless features. Waking him up seemed like a bad idea to me, people could lash out not realizing they're awake and still see what's distressing them from their dreams. I chewed my bottom lip worriedly in thought and gently touched his head and that too was a mistake as I was pulled into his mind. Instantly I knew something was off here as I wasn't in any sense psychic and while Loki could read minds to a certain degree, this wasn't part of his powers, someone or something else was causing this nightmare for him. Of course not being able to dream myself, I had certain powers or freedoms in others dreams and instantly decided whoever was doing this doesn't need to know who or what I am and became a dark mass of shifting shadows with glowing red eyes for funsies. Loki of course had no freedom or power in his creature-made nightmare, I could hear his cries of agony from wherever the fuck we were in not too far from where I was myself. The place was massive and I had to guess some kind of ship as it moved, the great structure, and it was entirely made of metals I couldn't even recognize. I followed the cries to where Loki was suspended in air and punctured by hot metal rods of some kind that floated on their own though the ugly hairless robed thing in front of him with the emotionless yet posh sounding voice was probably the real cause of it all. 

"You have failed Thanos for the last time, tell us where the others are and you will be given a merciful death," the creature demanded. Three hot rods shot into weak points in Loki's body, he jerked and moaned lowly but said nothing. "If your own pain won't break you, perhaps someone else's pain might." The creature gripped Loki's head then and I had to guess he was trying to pry information or an image perhaps of someone from Loki's memory to torment him with.

In a voice both demonic and dark, I chose to speak up before the thing succeeded in extracting the memory from Loki's mind. "No one torments Loki but me."

The creature whipped around to where he thought my voice came from but being the embodiment of something that happens everywhere allowed me to throw my voice anywhere but where I actually was. I shot forward to Loki then, solidifying enough to cup his head in both my hands and whispered in my own voice. "You gotta wake up, hun." Then I slapped him.

And boom boom, I'm back in our bedroom. Loki shot up with a gasp and wide wild eyes that searched the room before landing on me where he attempted to say something but only was able to get out, "how?"

"How's about you take a couple deep breaths and get your bearings straight first before you bring the Asgardian Inquisition here," I replied smoothly.

He attempted to glare at me but was still too frazzled by the waking nightmare to really react the way he wanted to. I took that moment of pause to cup his face in my hands for real this time and held his frightened gaze with my own while he attempted to catch his breath and understand he was back in reality and the pain he felt wasn't entirely real. One of his hands reached up and held one of mine still on him as if to make sure I was actually there in front of him. Eventually the crazed look dissipated and he simply held his gaze on mine for a moment longer before his breathing returned to normal and he seemed to calm down.

"You were in my dream," he murmured, stating a fact though there was an implication of a question underneath.

"I got pulled in when you woke me up with your night terrors," I told him. "That's not something I do on my own, the subconscious is all kinds of a mess I don't wanna get involved in. I was just trying to stop your thrashing and the touch alone got me in."

"Ebony Maw," Loki murmured. "Someone we should expect to come for the stones soon. My mental defenses must have been weakened enough for him to slip in and attack me like that."

I wanted to ask him more about what I saw in his nightmare but thought it best not to dig any deeper as the wound was still too fresh. "If he's into pain, he should try wearing a corset."

"I thought you liked corsets."

"I love them, but they're designed to reshape the body in a rather painful way which sometimes result in broken ribs and restricted breathing. I don't breathe or break easy so I don't mind them as much as the living might. Can you go back to sleep or do you need to strengthen your mind first lest he returns?"

Loki combed a hand through his mess of a mane and shook his head. "Don't need to sleep now anyway, I'll be fine.

"No one's ever fine when they say they are, hun."

Loki somehow managed to scowl at me despite his despair. "Go back to sleep, you needn't worry about me."

"I have more right to than you do of me," I grumbled while burrowing back into the covers. "I'm eternal, you're just immortal."

"I've had far more experience and endured far more than you could possibly imagine."

"I dunno, I can imagine a lot."

When I woke up at the right time of day, I found the spot next to me colder than usual as it was missing one smallish Frost Giant by giant standards. Scrambling out of bed in fear he might do something uncharacteristically stupid after that nightmare, I pulled on my clothes, shook the crazy out of my hair and hunted down the slippery snake in gold and green scales everyone else knew as Loki. I found him conversing with both Tony for once and Thor as well where a fancy looking spaceship was parked in what I could only guess was a big ass plane garage, or hanger. 

"Yall have pancakes and bacon without me? What kind of compound host are you?" I asked Tony.

All three spun around at me announcing myself, if Loki could slip out that quick and quietly, I could slip back in just the same. 

"A friend of mine is convinced you eat a different kind of meat these days, you wouldn't know anything about that would you?" challenged Tony smoothly.

"Different kind of meat? You mean like that vegetarian 'beyond meat' everyone's raving about? Nah, I like em raw and rrrrriggling. And not plant-based lies."

"Have you even tried an impossible burger?" Tony countered. "They taste exactly the same as real meat."

"Then what the fuck is the point of eating not real meat that copies real meat taste, you're only fooling yourself then. If you're against eating meat but still enjoy the taste then you're not really against it to begin with." I crossed my arms and arched an eyebrow in challenge at Tony.

"You really don't like vegetarians, do you?"

"They're a bit tasteless and stringy to be honest, they are what they eat."

"And what are you then?"

"Well your mechanized friend claims I eat other people so I guess you could say I'm a real humanitarian."

Tony had to smirk at my clever answer before turning back to the two brotherly gods who were watching us play verbal tennis. "I had my doubts about you at first but even after you escaped house arrest you turned out not all bad in the end. Loki, if you don't return her in the condition she left this planet in, you will in turn come out in worse condition than her."

"Is that a threat, Stark?" mocked Loki.

"Call it whatever you want, it will happen, I'll make sure of it."

"Aw Tony, did you finally see Oz about that heart you've been after for so long?" I teased.

"Who's the Lion in the team then?" he countered.

"Clearly it's Peter, the dude reminds me of those nervous shivering lapdogs. The Witch is obviously Dorothy, I mean ruby heels would really pull the whole outfit together."

"Who would win in a fight, her or Loki?"

"Loki, and I'm not saying that because I love him, her powers are a drop in the ocean of magic wielders that Loki is the moon to."

"That was strangely poetic."

I shrugged. "Wordsmith I suppose, been known to happen. What were you boys up to?"

"We're pushing the take-off date to asap, your god is getting antsy and a nervous god is a bad sign for us naturally nervous mortals."

"What do you mean 'us mortals'?"

Loki moved to stand beside me and gently pulled me against him and a weirdly calming affect happened between the two of us. "I didn't mean to leave you," he murmured into my hair.

"Yeah you did, you wanker. Don't need to be the god of lies to see that one. I should kick your ass for that but I wouldn't want to damage one of your best qualities when it's already cracked." I chose to elbow him in the gut as I usually do, causing him to grunt and bend in a bit in surprise.

"Insufferable woman."

"Love you too, fucknugget."

"You two make me sick," muttered Tony, watching us from the sidelines.

"That is because you're a mortal and we are not," Loki replied smoothly.

I stuck my tongue out at Tony for emphasis. "Sucks to have an expiration date don't it? From Tony Stank to Tony Stale."

Even Thor had to chuckle at this being near immortal himself. "Are we all good now?"

"No one here is good, there's bits of evil in all of us to balance that out, some more than others," I replied. "For everything else, there's Mastercard. Can I captain the ship?"

"No," all three men simultaneously replied.

"It's because I'm dead isn't it?" I grumbled, crossing my arms with a frown.

"It's because you don't even have a driver's license let alone a space license," Tony argued.

"You try getting a legit driver's license when you don't have a last name and don't exist on paper or the government. Neither of these two Asgardian asshats have a license for anything either."

"But I know at least one of them have experience in flying them as that's how they got themselves and their people here after the planet blew up."

"You're all meaniepants."

"Don't you go brooding in the corner now, that's Loki's job."

"Yeah well he'll be too busy driving to notice me stealing that job so I can do what I fucking want." I stuck out my tongue to prove my point. "Where we flying anyway? Any of you have an actual destination in mind or are we gonna just go wherever the space wind takes us?"

"You do know that space is a vacuum, right?" asked Tony incredulously.

"If that was true, there wouldn't be such a thing as space cats and Loki is convinced we have one at home. Of all the pantheons and mythos, there are only two I know of that love cats, the Norse and the Egyptians so I kinda have to believe Loki on this being that he is in fact a space Viking."

"Woman, I told you to stop calling me that," muttered Loki who was watching me bicker at Tony.

"Don't tell me how to live my afterlife," I countered lazily. "Not a denial on any of those facts though, check and mate."

Tony just rolled his eyes at me. "How old are you again?"

"Still haven't figured it out yet, eh?" I teased, recalling him asking me that when we first met and he kept me in the compound.

"You'll be the death of me."

"I'm the death of everyone, hun, your turn will come."


	14. Bring Me New Horizons

Space, the final frontier...these are the voyages of the spaceship Tony designed for us. It's one mission: to explore strange, new "realms", to seek out new civilizations and hope they're friendly and fight for our cause. To boldly ask what few people have before. That is of course, are you for life, according to Thor. Thor and Loki of course were both totally unbothered by the take-off of the ship as if it was just another walk in the park for them though from what Loki described of the bifrost, this method was a bit safer way to travel despite being much longer a trip. Considering the two of them got tossed out of this rainbow beam of light transportation and ended up in Picasso's land of the lost, one could understand why being confined to a metal contraption with a little bit more control where you want to go was better.

I watched from the window as the planet I had crawled out of several times grew smaller and farther away from me and glanced over at Loki who was watching my reaction to my first space adventure a few feet away. "Is this why you two used to think us beneath you?"

"Mostly because of how fleeting your lives were compared to ours and how much shorter you made it on yourselves," Loki answered easily, earning a glare and an elbow jab from his brother next to him. "What? She asked and I wasn't going to lie to her despite my godhood name."

"We were young and foolish and full of ourselves and what our father led us to believe," corrected Thor. "We thought every realm was beneath us, not just yours."

"Asgardian thing or royalty thing?" I asked curiously.

"A little bit of both."

I nodded in acceptance of that answer and continued to watch my planet slip away from me. "How long will this mission of ours take?"

"What are you worried about?" asked Loki.

"I don't do well with flying, that's how Hydra snagged me the first time."

"If you hadn't taken down all the bases of operations, I still highly doubt they'd be after you when there's much easier prey still on your planet for them to hunt," Thor assured me.

"It's not me I'm worried about," I murmured to Thor and my eyes locked on Loki's. "My enemies will always be earthbound as traveling isn't exactly in my nature. You two though...you've been everywhere else and aren't exactly the friendliest, peaceful space peeps in all your adventures I'm told. I won't be much use to you in space or air, the dead don't float that far up unless killer clowns are involved."

"There must have been times you didn't rely on your zombies and restless dead to win a fight, right?" Thor offered.

"If I can get dangerously close to the target with the element of surprise, sure but that's not a sure thing in itself."

"Ah you're much like Loki's style in that regard, shouldn't be a problem, I'll get their attention first, then you can strike," Thor suggested. "Whatever happens, we will prevail, don't you worry about being useful to us. At the very least you keep Loki saner than he'd have been without your support."

I glanced at Loki again who winked at me playfully with a knowing smirk. "Wouldn't go that far, Point Break, we're all mad here."

"Point Break? Did I hear that correctly? You've been hanging around Tony too long," Thor muttered in bemusement.

"Any time around Tony is too long around him, that's really not saying much."

"Yeah, that's fair, I'll give you that." Thor flicked a switch as the ride became a bit rocky and once it went back to smooth sailing again we were officially out of the atmosphere and in space.

I stared out at the vast emptiness as earth disappeared from the ship and felt a bit empty myself looking into the endless sparkly void of space. Is this what would greet me in the end of all things? That seemed mind-numblingly boring if that was the case. Maybe the higher ups will just end me once I've done my job and I won't have to worry about what comes after. I looked over at Loki again curiously which he instantly took notice of and joined my side.

"What are you thinking?" he murmured.

"I'm recalling something you told me of your past," I replied.

"I'm over a thousand years old as you love to remind me, there's quite a bit of that, you'll have to be more specific."

"When you fell from the bifrost," I started in a somber voice.

Being the super clever god that he was, he instantly connected the dots on my thoughts. "You're wondering how I was able to survive the void before Thanos got me. I wish I could answer that but whatever memory I had between the fall and him was warped by him and the mindstone if not erased completely. He had me convinced Thor had actually physically thrown me from the bridge into the void but Thor later let me look into his memories to prove I had let go myself. What I can tell you is there is a lot we can survive that no mortal could, we're practically born for battle and bloodshed. Thor is a prime example of that."

"What about you though, you're not like Thor at all and I'm willing to bet you've survived much worse than he has."

He cupped my face in one hand and looked deep into my eyes. "Such faith in me, you give me too much credit."

"You know what I am, Loki, the painful truth to life's beautiful lie, that means I'm giving exactly as much credit as you deserve."

"Damn your twisted logic," growled Loki though a smile tugged at his lips.

"Like yours is any less gnarled," I countered. "Mr. Silvertongue."

"You say that like you won't be Mrs. Silvertongue at one point," he teased.

"Dead girls tell no tales like you do, Liesmith. And if you're gonna use the surname card on me, of the two of us which has two surnames to choose from still before saying I do?" I countered.

"Which would you prefer to take from me?" he sprung on me.

I blinked, surprised he actually offered me that as a choice. "This seems like a trick question, I choose door number three."

"What is it you once said, choosing to not answer or deflect the question usually means your actual answer is the one you don't wish to speak of. But then that still might go both ways." He narrowed his eyes suspiciously at me as if I was some enigma or brain teaser puzzle like a rubix cube or why do men chase women. Then his eyes widened suddenly and he seemed to have found the answer I didn't in fact want to give him up front. "Laufeyson...why?"

"I plead the fifth," I answered quickly.

"Midgardian laws don't apply when you aren't even on Midgard to begin with."

"Damn your logic," I muttered.

"Why him?" Loki pressed.

"While neither of them were really considered father material, he showed you more mercy than the one that raised you did and didn't twist the truth from what you and Thor told me."

"How is leaving me to die as a baby considered mercy?" snapped Loki.

"You told me you were the runt of the frost litter, runts aside from like Clifford the dog don't usually last long, too weak and small to fend for themselves in any race or species. If they do survive they're the easiest targets of the rest of their kind, bullied, tormented, ostracized and outcast. One of two things happen then, at least as far as mortals are concerned, they lash out violently towards everyone, not just their oppressors, or they commit suicide, unable to bear the loneliness and agony they've had to endure on their own. Your biological father was attempting to spare you the lifelong hell you would've lived had he raised you himself. And then comes Odin who not only took you for his own political gain but put you right back into the hell Laufey tried to spare you from. I have nothing but contempt for that supposed king of gods that claimed he lost an eye for wisdom, you need both eyes to see things clearly or you're only seeing half of the whole truth. Explains why Fury didn't see Hydra invading his own organization, beware of the cyclops."

"I was led to believe that phrase meant the Causasian invasion otherwise known as the KKK," Loki noted.

"Those too, they probably think you're Space Hitler since the whole New York invasion and you challenging Captain Underpants in a fight in Germany. They're to Hydra what gorillas and orangutans are to Midgardians, distant cousins that missed the evolution by that much."

It was Thor that spoke up then. "You speak as if you know exactly what it's like to be the runt of the litter."

"In a sense," I replied honestly. "When you're the only kid in an entire school most likely that sees dead people and are too old to claim they're imaginary friends that just happen to have the same name and antics as someone that's died and is haunting the living, you get singled out and shunned and branded unimaginative names like ghost girl and freak." I turned my attention from Loki to Thor and looked him dead in the eyes, pun intended. "You're the only one here that doesn't know anything about that though."

"Nell," Loki spoke in a soft, soothing voice, most likely sensing the underlying tone of disgust coming from me.

"What? He started it, getting stuck on that of the entire rant I made," I argued.

"I've lived with that so much longer than you and I've let it go."

"Yeah well, you're the hot male version of Elsa, that's kinda your thing."

"Don't pick fights with my brother, that's my job."

"What else is there to do here then?" I grumbled, crossing my arms and glaring past Loki at Thor.

"Do you still see the dead after all this time?" asked Thor with an unmasked tone of hope.

"Always," I replied in a deep British accent.

"Even now? In space?"

Loki caught on to what his brother was hinting at and bristled instantly. "Thor, don't."

Thor turned his attention to Loki, hearing the stern warning tone and arched an eyebrow. "Why not?"

"You're asking too much of her, her gifts aren't party tricks to pass the time."

Thor looked from Loki to me back to Loki and frowned. "What aren't you telling me here?"

"There is one such spirit hanging around you, one I'd have no problem sending straight to your sister," I stated dryly.

"Who?" demanded Thor before Loki could stop him again.

"Asgard's favorite cyclops."

"That's not possible, we saw him pass on to greet our mother," Thor stated.

"And I released your mother from Loki while still under Tony's house arrest, your point?"

Thor glared at me and stiffened like he was preparing himself to attack. "And you want to send him where?"

Loki despite fully understanding my contempt for the deceased, stood between me and the god of shitty weather who was actually starting to spark around his hands. "I told you not to start fights with him."

"He fucking started it, I backed off but he kept pressing, this one's on him and his Assgod stubbornness."

"What has my father done to you?" demanded Thor.

"His web of lies destroyed your family and essentially your entire planet yet you still revere him as a wise leader when every disaster could've been avoided had he actually been wise and told the truth."

"What happened between my family and my planet should be no concern of yours."

"That's rich coming from someone who just decided to dump all of what was left of both on me and mine. You are the prime cause of my involvement, you chose to seek asylum on my planet and involve your heroics and your brother with my extraction from Hydra so naturally you fucking made it my concern. You just love putting the blame on anything on anyone but yourself, don't you? Planet blew up? Must be Loki. Father died? Must be Loki. Angry ghost whisperer calling you out, must be Loki's lady. I wonder how you'll deal with a problem when there's no one around to point fingers at." I looked Thor right in his darkening blue eyes with my own milky ones narrowed. "I won't send him to his daughter, she might actually want that and think we're friends."

"Is there anyone in the family you actually like?" asked Thor incredulously.

"Besides Loki? Frigga definitely." I turned back to Loki then. "Stand down, no brawls till we actually land somewhere then I'll feed him to the nearest burial site."

"You actually met Frigga?" Thor was definitely somewhere between a golden doodle pup and a squirrel with how easily distracted he could become.

"Well I am marrying this one, was gonna have to meet at least one parent at some point."

"You couldn't possibly know that when you met her," added Loki.

I smirked at his disbelief. "I find your lack of faith disturbing. The dead cannot tell lies and she told me if I put all my trust in you, you would give your life to me which could easily be interpreted as hitched for life as you didn't swear an oath to be my champion or anything medieval like that. Clearly she was the actual wise one in the family. Asgardians are the griffindors, Vanir are the Ravenclaws, Midgardians are the Hufflepuffs, and Loki and I are the Slytherins. Nuff said."

"You knew then?"Loki demanded. "This whole time?"

"I had some doubts you'd actually go through with it but once you made us a home I was convinced otherwise. No takebacks."

"Wait a second, you said you released Frigga, what do you mean by that?" interrupted Thor.

"You catch on quick, dontcha? She was lingering over Loki like the devoted mother she was to him when no one else was, the dead choose to linger for their own reasons, usually some form of unfinished business, as a ghost whisperer I made that business between them finished and she was able to let go of him and pass on. I will not be doing that with you as I can tell that's what you'll ask next." I looked past Thor then to the unseen form swirling behind him. "You need to let him go and he needs to see the err of his ways completely, no one gets a free pass on my account."

"The err of his ways? Can you-can she even do that?" he turned to Loki then.

"You ask me like I'm the one that makes the rules here, I'm just an extraterrestrial sorcerer, she's the most powerful necromancer in the realm, the dead are her domain, her kingdom, she makes the rules there."

Thor was silent for a moment, studying me with narrowed eyes. "What are you really?"

"The day you learn the answer to that is the day you wish you never asked."

"You won't tell me now? Does Loki know?"

"Neither of us will tell you," Loki admonished, surprising Thor with his answer.

"But you're not exactly what Tony and Shield thinks you are."

"They guess or assume but they don't have all the facts." I crossed my arms and gave the god a smugass look that could crush Loki's best smirk.

"And why can't you tell me?"

"Because you didn't ask nicely. Seriously, can we speed this journey up any?"

"What's the hurry?" Thor sassed back.

"I spent five years cut off from life, love, society, social contact of any kind, and entertainment, I don't want to be cut off from that again. Ever."

Thor was silent for a moment, glancing from me to Loki then back to me. "What did Hydra do to you then?"

"They tried to master death and found they were still mortal in the end." I pretended to polish my nails, Loki and probably Tony who had hacked their recordings and found out for himself were the only ones that knew what they tried on me. It was an ordeal sure as there was a fuckton of better things I could be doing with my time than being their fucking lab rat but they weren't the actual worst things to happen to me despite how completely mental and heartless Hydra was. You kinda have to expect the worst from mad scientists so when they actually do their stuff, they don't actually meet the evil meter like you expect them to.

"And how are you different from my sister?" asked Thor carefully.

"She demands the dead to serve her, mindless, soulless bodies that just do as she wants. I don't do that, I ask any unquiet dead soul if they want to fuck shit up with me, most of the time its the victims or any others dead because of the target so they jump out of their graves at the chance for one final showdown so they can finish what they started."

Loki looked thoughtful for a moment, though he knew all this having asked this when we first met. "Hela only ever used our own Asgardian soldiers against us though that was because she drew her power from the realm. Could you raise any kind of unquiet dead?"

I arched an eyebrow at his question. "You planning on killing a lot of aliens for me first?"

"That's more Thor's forte to be honest but it wouldn't surprise me. Is it possible though?"

"I've not actually had to try it so I wouldn't know but I would assume so, if there's a soul there's a way. Why, what are you plotting?"

"You were worried you wouldn't be much help to our plight, would it hurt to try that?"

I shrugged. "There's a first time for everything I suppose. I've still yet to join the lightyears high club."

Loki smirked, welcomed by humans or not, he was much more well versed in their lingo than Thor and knew exactly what that was. "You sure you're up for it?"

"I'm betting that's what will make this mediocre voyage into a fantastic voyage."


	15. Space Commodities

Loki couldn't shake the feeling of impending doom from his gut no matter how often he bedded his betrothed during their journey. The mind breaking dream all but solidified his fear that they were coming and they were far too close for his liking. He had done his best to prepare Tony and the Avengers for what was to come for them and they surely would as long as the stones were still in their possession, no amount of reasoning and urging them to have them destroyed convinced the Avengers to do so sadly. They simply didn't trust him enough to take him for his word, even when Thor came into the equation with the solution of destroying them so no one could get the stones. On top of everything else, Cro secretly paid him another visit warning him he would have to make a few really heartbreaking choices and when the actual time came to choose them, he would be given the exact tools to do so with Cro's help. That sounded simply enough but Cro only showed up when things were about to get really bad or really dangerous for either him or Nell. It made it that much harder for him to keep the calm, collected facade going whilst around the only people in the multiverse that knew him too well. 

He glanced at both of them, Thor at the controls as always, a hopeful, excited look on his face like the dog he was, and Nell staring out into space curiously and singing the beginning lyrics to the Sound of Silence like the jokester she was though he knew full well that was a coverup as she was still scared of flying. He really studied his betrothed while she was distracted by the vastness of space. She compared herself to a corpse constantly but he had to disagree with her there, between his age and his experience in battle, he had seen his fair share of dead bodies and none were remotely as attractive as she was. He found her nearly colorless milky eyes hauntingly alluring as while they first appeared lifeless, they held any and all emotions she was feeling then, usually amusement or annoyance. Her body wasn't skeletal or bloated like corpses are at one point or another, just slim and taut and agile when needed and cool to the touch though only came alive at his touch. That last part made him especially happy, no one else got that effect from like she did. Then came her long bonewhite hair she often threatened to cut, having gotten tired of detangling it but was usually too lazy to see it through. Tony had often referred to them as the yin yang twins having figured out they were as much opposites as they were similar, opposite hair color, opposite power sources, she brought life back to the dead, while he was already known for taking lives when he first showed up on earth. There was some truth to that nickname though, they balanced each other out in plenty of ways. 

Without her, he might as well go back to his old ways. He couldn't count on his brother all the time, especially after his brother had essentially left him to die in agony on Sakaar. It was one thing if Loki had pulled that move on Thor, he was known for his trickery after all, but for Thor to do that back meant that he couldn't be trusted either. Loki wondered what the Avengers would think of Thor if they knew he did that to his own brother. Probably give the god a high five, Thor would always be their favorite god, the one that didn't try to take over the world with an army of aliens. And then there was Nell, who took one look at Loki when she first met him and full on flirted with the god as if she wasn't potentially at his mercy from inside her cage then. Even after Tony showed her all he had done in New York, she still jumped him like a horny kangaroo. The only time she wavered in her trust was when her own kind were turning on her, nothing he personally had done gave her pause. He wondered if he really could do no wrong by her and that made him love her even more. Where everyone including his own family only saw the bad in him, no matter how much good he actually did, she only saw him as he was, nothing more nothing less. 

"Are we there yet?" asked Nell not to innocently, interrupting Loki's thoughts.

"Your first journey into space and already you're bored of it?" asked Thor incredulously.

"All I see is darkness and stars, gimme some planets and we'll talk."

"Starting to sound like Thor with wanting there to be more action in his adventures," mused Loki. "Should've just been you and I flying this ship."

"If it was just us, I'd never leave the cockpit," Nell joked.

Thor raised an eyebrow at the couple, Loki should his head and tried not to smirk at her little puns and sexual inuendos.

"You say that like it's a bad thing when I heard all but you complaining last time," Loki purred.

"I mean what's the point of flying in this double death trap if all we'll be doing is that? We can do that anywhere."

Loki arched an eyebrow at her then, she never failed to amuse him with their bickering. "I could have a double do the work while we're at play."

"I'm reminded of that movie where a giant blue dude is building a doomsday device while two more of him are shagging his girlfriend, either doing me will distract you or I'll start to worry you're not really into it if you're not distracted."

"You didn't have to join us, you know."

"Yeah I did, don't lie, till your death do us part." She held up her engaged hand proudly to emphasize her point.

"I didn't give you that to lord it over me either."

"No, you gave me that to keep tabs on me when of the two of us you're the one more likely to be in trouble being the Norse embodiment of it and all that."

"I'm sorry he gave you that ring to what?" interrupted Thor.

"It's a shiny, sparkly super expensive tracking device," Nell answered easily. "Because someone's a tad paranoid they'd lose a white haired wraith in a room full of blondes and brunets with tans."

"I'm not paranoid," Loki argued.

"Hun, you're more nervous than a longtailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs when it comes to losing me like that would ever happen."

"I lost you to your ex if you recall."

"I totally had that handled."

"How is being literally nailed to a wooden slab and bled out handled? Like how you handled being caught by Hydra the first time?"

Nell scowled at the second scenario. "You can't use that one, that's how we met so it all worked out in the end."

"I freed you then and I freed you from your witchy ex regardless of how you saw it. You need me and I might not always be there when you do, hence the ring."

"Right, the ring that's only meant to be a simple of love and commitment to each other, not a tracking device."

"I thought you said you worked this out," mused Thor in the midst of their banter.

"I thought it was," Nell admitted. "Needing you isn't the issue, I mean maybe a little, I do need you with me, I don't need a hero though, I'm not some helpless mortal like Thor's Jane."

"Hey, leave my love life out of this," Thor bellowed, making Loki smirk.

"I know you're not so when I see you in imminent danger it makes it that much scarier for me seeing someone indestructible essentially broken," Loki explained.

"Ah so you can be scared of me after all," Nell gathered.

Loki rolled his eyes at her, of course that's what she got from his admission. "Not my point and you know it."

"And you thought he only cared about himself," snarked Nell to Thor randomly. "Shun the nonbeliever, shun shun! There's an old earth saying, a leopard can't change its spots but Loki here ain't a giant pussy, he's a snake and a snake changes his skin as soon as he's started growing and let me tell you, Loki here is really good at changing his skin. Blue is one of my least favorite colors but damn does he make it look good."

"Maybe I should just keep you in my chambers on this ship," Loki mused at her ranting.

"You're welcome to try," Nell challenged slyly.

Of course, right after she said that and right before Loki could counter it, a shadow fell over their little spaceship and a massive ship came into their view. Loki recognized it immediately and was filled with all kinds of fear and dread that he would have to shove deep into his gut if he was going to play his cards right. Thor, oblivious of what had been coming and was now right in front of them had a sort of curious, almost excited look upon seeing the spaceship of doom. Loki had to both act and think fast at that moment, he knew what he had to do, but it was all about timing, if he acted too quickly he could throw everything planned off and if he acted too slow they were all doomed.

"Throw up the shields and prepare for battle, brother," Loki told Thor sternly.

"You know this ship?" Thor asked.

Loki didn't answer, his face stoic and stiff to hide the dread, his eyes sharp and dark like obsidian blades. Thor took note of his brother's expression and did as instructed and that's when all hell broke loose. Even with both Stark's and Asgardian tech combined, they didn't stand a chance against the massive warship. If they simply fled in retreat, they'd be blown to pieces instantly, there was no way to get away from this unscathed. The attack or rather the ambush was quick, hellish, and nerve racking before the assailants themselves boarded their ship while the three was trying to recover from being shot at and thrown off their feet and into whatever broke their fall from the explosions. Loki scrambled to his feet after his brother and rushed to Nell's side as she was vehemently cursing out the attackers. He split himself into just one double while he the original pulled Nell still struggling to get to her feet against him and went invisible with her, summoned a specially made blade from a pocket dimension, silently asked her forgiveness and slid the blade into her back swiftly. She had but a moment of complete and utter shock before she was out colder than death, going limp in his hold like a rag doll. He had to act fast even with her completely in his grasp or the Order would see through his tricks and teleported with her to an escape pod, flicking on the cloaking mechanism before launching the two of them fast and far from the destruction about to happen. His double would do his best to help his brother and convince the attacker there was the two in front of them on the ship while he and his betrothed would hopefully fly to safety. That was the plan after all. He just hoped Nell would forgive him for that trick she never saw coming. He stared at the blade still in his hand, stained black with her blood and glared at it till it dissolved out of existence, Cro did say this would be a one trick pony. Only Loki could be her weakness and no one else should ever get that power over her aside from of course Cro and the other Supremes. 

Loki glanced out the tiny pod's window one time only while clutching Nell to him just to see the spaceship explode into pieces and prayed to the Norns that Thor was still alive and that somehow by some miracle he would survive all this to the end. Cro was right, the choice would be painful to make but still quite simple, stay with his brother and die trying or flee with his love and survive another day. Loki wondered if it was a bad thing that he was more concerned about Nell forgiving him for his tricks than Thor would if they ever saw each other again after this. It probably was because Thor expected his tricks and even the smallest, silliest ones he never truly forgave and forgot about despite knowing it was in Loki's nature. Nell on the other hand didn't actually expect much from Loki, she was just glad to have him by her side and whatever came with him, there was nothing to forgive then.

Loki had grown beyond tired of trying to do right by Thor, trying to redeem himself for his brother or get his approval at all, he thought he had gotten that by avenging their mother's death but then Thor decided that wasn't enough after blaming his father's death on Loki too. He was done trying to please his brother, sure he would help when asked or persuaded otherwise but if he was looking for anyone's good graces, it was Nell's. He held her still form closer against himself, all that mattered to him now was her. Thor had left him for dead before they landed on earth after all, he had even encouraged if not assisted in Loki's house arrest via Dr. Strange's methods of containment as no earthly means or materials including the mystic arts could dampen his magic but Asgardian means could. Thor was on his own if he survived this, that's what he wanted after all, he didn't want his brother's help unless it was to make himself look better and on his terms. He didn't need Loki much less want his company and while Nell tried to deny it, she needed Loki in more ways than one and he was more than willing to give himself to her in any and all of those ways. He just had to make sure they were both still alive for him to do that, simple, right?


	16. When Hel Freezes Over

You ever fall victim to a nap attack and the second you wake up, you're in an unexplained panic worried you overslept and missed something important during that time like you missed work or a class or a date or something even though you know you have none of those really happening? That's kinda what it felt like except I had a really good reason to panic as the last thing I remembered before my vision faded into darkness was a bigass ship coming into view and then an excruciating pain in my back. Before I even got a baring on my surroundings, I reached behind me to feel for whatever went into my back but nothing was there, just a now dulled pain. I looked around me curiously, trying to piece together what I actually had missed when I blacked out, either the spaceship had shrunk or I wasn't in the same spaceship anymore and it was decidedly not floating through space but had landed. There was also the issue of the only exit of this tiny ship being completely ripped off to show I wasn't in Kansas anymore but some frozen hell from the looks of it and most importantly the one person I needed that knew anything about other planets was missing. Where the fuck was Loki?

It wasn't like him to just leave someone he insisted needed him without any word or warning. I looked around for an evidence as to where he would've gone. There was no blood in the tiny ship I was in so at the very least he wasn't bleeding out somewhere else, I hoped. I sluggishly climbed out of the fallen ship and looked around some more. Where the fuck did we land? All around me was snow and mountains and darkness and good god was it cold even for someone already cold and dead inside. I spotted the door of the ship we landed in and knew from the damage left on it that it wasn't Loki that tore it off the ship, something much bigger and stronger had to have done that, it reminded me of when you crushed a soda can after emptying it. I looked around for tracks of any kind desperately, hoping I could at least go after the thing that wrecked our ship more but found none anywhere near me, either I had been out cold too long and the tracks were buried with the snow once more or everything on this planet was like Legolas and walked above the snow, not in it. One thing was for certain, I couldn't stay where I was, with no door to keep the cold and the snow out, the wrecked ship was useless as far as shelter went, I needed to keep moving. 

"I'm stranded in a white planet," I sang to myself to keep sane as I trudged through the frozen tundra aimlessly. "Just like the one that Loki knows. Where the mountaintops glisten, and Loki's still missin', and I don't know where the hell to go."

That's when I heard a loud growl and looked to one side to see a massive blue/grey thing with bigass tusks charging at me. It had to have been as big as a triceratops if the skeletons in the museums were correct but twice as ugly and definitely not a plant eater if it was making me its prime target. Armed with only my dagger, completely lost and not quite convinced poking that thing with my little blade would slow it down, I settled for just shifting into a defiant defensive stance and staring it down. Worse came to worse I could just carve myself out of its stomach. It never came to that though as just one step short of stepping on me, it stopped short itself and sniffed me then growled in what could only be confusion and disgust. That was a perk of being me I suppose, I didn't smell like food despite being bite-sized, no animal wanted to eat me no matter how good I looked, thus far only Loki could have a taste. For a long moment, we simply stared at each other, waiting for the other to make a move before I did something that you're actually not supposed to do with any kind of animal and held up a hand to it. You do that to a dog, they're likely to bite it thinking you're about to grab or hit it, cats will just claw yours to shreds if they don't know you or just don't like you. This thing however sniffed mine then decided because I was not considered food and not about to smack a bitch, I was a friend and got on its belly and I realized it was in fact offering me a ride. I bit back some of my excitement on my first intergalactic pet and pulled myself onto it from one of its legs, careful to avoid the spikes on its hide before getting as comfortable as one could without a saddle on its back.

"Alright beastie, yip yip!" I half joked to myself and was more than a little surprised when it actually took off with me hanging onto it for dear afterlife.

If this planet wasn't so devoid of light and life, it probably would've been a glorious sight to behold and more a winter wonderland, less arctic wasteland. Eventually the beast slowed down as it came to a forest region though the trees that it was made of were frozen solid, like the Petrified Forest back on earth excite ice instead of stone. Deeper and deeper the beast traveled into the ice woods till it stopped in probably the heart of the forest where a bigass sort of fortress made of stone and ice stood. Of course it was only then that I recalled most of Grimm's Fairy Tales where a kid or two finds a random ass house in the middle of the woods and it turns out to be a witch that eats kids. Instinctively, I looked at the bottom of the building for chicken feet, wasn't Baba Yaga a Norwegian tale? Maybe it was Russian, yet another frozen tundra back home. Hesitantly, I climbed off my new ride and jokingly told him to sit and stay before making my way to the door and looked up wondering how the hell I was gonna reach the doorknob let along the bigass ring above it. What knockers! I raised a fist to knock on the door myself but it ominously opened on its own, there had to be a witch living here and not a fun one like in Salem. 

"Why are you here, on my planet?" a booming voice echoed the second I set foot inside the fortress.

"We crashed here, our ship was attacked," I answered honestly.

"We?"

"I don't know where he is now, there were two of us, myself and an Asgardian."

"Asgardian?! Then he is surely dead, those people bring us nothing but death and war," sneered the voice.

I arched an eyebrow, that seemed fair as while he wasn't actually Asgardian but everyone else recognized him as one having been born and raised there, and he did bring an embodiment of death with him. "That realm's long since been snuffed out, they are no longer a threat to your people."

"That may be...but we know of at least one survivor of that disaster still at large and still a danger, the son of Odin who restarted the war."

"He was on the ship as well but I don't think he came with us."

There was a long silence as I looked around, every space, every room I could see, everything about this fortress was so massive I felt like a mouse in a normal human's house, I wondered if there was cheese absent-mindedly. 

"Where did you come from, what is your realm?"

"Midgard is what you other realms call it, we just call it earth though, less fancy more blunt."

Two glowing red eyes pierced the darkness of the room directly in front of me and suddenly the entirety of at least the space I was in within the walls of the fortress lit up with glowing balls of what I had to assume was magic of some kind. With the red eyes came a massive bluish body of muscles and ice and ridges adorned with what was a mix of whatever material armor was made of here and fur. Call me sexist but seeing the voice belonged to a woman instantly put me at ease...unless males had boobs too on this planet, you never know. Wait a second, frozen realm, hatred of Asgardians, red eyes and blue skin. "This is Jotunheim, isn't it?"

The giantess grinned at my realization. "Welcome, little mortal."

I scowled at her title for me. "I'm neither of those things, I'm a funsized immortal."

She leered at me curiously and sniffed the air. "Midgard is the home of mortals, is it not?"

"Oh it's home to more than just your average human, case and point me."

She studied me from her great chair that was probably a throne in its own right. "Come forth then. What are you called then, immortal?"

"I'm Nell, I have no family or memory of them so I am no one's daughter. And you are?"

"I am Skadi, goddess of winter. Tell me, Lady Nell, how is it you are so unaffected by the cold for a Midgardian?"

"Because frostbite only affects the living," I replied easily.

"Is that why you look with such dead, hollow eyes?" she countered.

"Don't take it personally, I see everyone that way."

She cackled in her seat, her eyes gleaming with glee. "You speak with such ease and lightness despite being so far from home and as one female to another, that takes a lot of courage. I welcome you, Lady Nell to my home in the Frozen Forest."

Both my eyebrows shot up in surprise, was it really that easy? "Thank you for your hospitality." I suppose it's true what they say back in Salem, witches gotta stick together.


	17. Exes and Oh Nos

One would think if they didn't know Loki as well as they claimed, this was exactly what he had wanted, what he had been raised to believe was his own right. Yet here he sat on the throne in Utgard on the edge of his seat and looking anything but pleased with himself wondering why he couldn't leave a place he was all but imprisoned to rule. They were only so lucky they found him unconscious when the escape pod crash-landed in their realm or he would've waged bloody hell on them for prying him from his betrothed and dragging him alone all the way to this gods-forsaken city. The elders had prophesied his return, their "rightful king" would fall from the sky, more powerful than any king before, even his own biological father and return their realm to its former glory. At least that's the part of the prophesy the rest of the Jotunns cared about, the rest was in their opinion just mystical stuff they need not concern themselves with. Their ruler had returned to them and they were determined to keep it that way which meant eyes were always on him, making sure he was "protected and secured" at all times. Loki was no stranger to that lie, Asgard or Jotunheim, he was still a caged bird, even before he had fallen from his father's good graces and was forced into attacking Midgard, he was guarded most of his life under the pretense of "protection".

All he wanted to do was get back to the escape pod to his betrothed, Cro didn't say for how long she would be out of commission after he stabbed her in the back quite literally, he didn't know in what state she would be in, if she was still safe in the pod, if worse things got to her than himself after they crashed here. She always told him there was no need to worry about her, she would literally be around till the end but that simply wasn't enough reassurance for him not to worry about her. Why hadn't they taken her with them when they found them in the wreck? Oh right, because they saw her as dead and gone when she was clearly just dead asleep. Really what good was being the king of a realm if you couldn't bloody do whatever you wanted? It certainly didn't help he couldn't track her with her ring for some reason, it might have something to do with him being weakened since the escape from their space ship, it took so much magic to make a completely real and convincing double that would fool even the Mad Titan when it died in his grasp. It took even more magic and energy to protect the two of them when they crashed onto the planet and that's why it was so easy for the inhabitants of this planet to just snatch him from the escape pod, he might as well have been a Midgard mortal then having overextended himself. He couldn't track her with him own magic attached to her when he had no magic at his immediate disposal and thus was trapped and blinded within the fortress that was supposedly his.

"My Lord, we have returned from the crash site, there was nothing inside though we did see a snow beast leaving it before we got there," a guard reported to him, pulling his attention from his thoughts.

Loki wondered what would happen if she met a creature massive enough to swallow her whole without needing to chew first. She was unnaturally strong but she was also small despite her claims to being average sized for a Midgardian woman. He recalled how Thor just went through the beast at one point in their early years like a Midgardian bullet but she didn't fly, she couldn't even levitate, the woman was scared to death of being airborne though so that was usually a blessing. He supposed she'd just have to claw her way back out of its belly or get lodged in its throat and choke it to death first. He then wondered if snow beasts even eat things not alive, would it care what state their prey is in? He cursed his weakened body for not being able to find any answers himself from the questions that plagued his mind. She had to be somewhere though, and she had to be more or less alive, he was assured if he chose her that she would survive the path he chose with him. But it still unnerved him not having her by his side, not knowing where she was or what state she was in since he knocked her out. He dismissed his guards with a nod and a half assed wave of one hand. He had his fun being king of Asgard albeit disguised, he no longer wanted to just sit idly on a throne and bark orders all day, especially not alone. His mind then began to wonder what she would be like as a queen ruling by his side though he knew that wasn't exactly her ideal position, she already had an army to rule over and her current position gave her the mindset that all things good or bad will come to an end with her. She also didn't particularly like the living to begin with. He then began to wonder why she loved him so much, a living breathing god who drew power from the tree of life. He really hoped this wasn't a very elongated effect of hero syndrome where she just fell for him because he freed her from Hydra when they first met.

"Why the long face, darling? I thought this was what you always wanted," a familiar voice purred from behind his throne. Then there was this witch.

Loki didn't need to turn his head in the direction of said voice to know who and where it came from, he wasn't going to give them his attention as he knew that's exactly what they wanted. "You have no idea what I want right now but I'll give you a hint, it involves using your head for a Midgardian favored sport."

A tall, sunkissed woman with long blond hair and a devious smile walked out from behind the throne's shadow and stood beside it and him with a hand on her hip. "It's been so long since we last talked, I have missed that silver tongue of yours. And my what a handsome man you've become in my absence."

Loki simply rolled his eyes at her flattery, there used to be a time where he hung on her every word and rolled over to her every whim but he had long since outgrown everything and anything that involved the woman beside him now. He was more than confident that the student he once was to her had long since become the master. It also helped he was in fact the king of this realm now and she was just a lowly, exiled Asgardian that somehow had escaped the Jotunns' wrath this long while hiding here. "If you're quite done squawking," he drawled.

She studied him for a moment while he didn't as much as glance in her direction let alone look her in the eyes. She huffed at the complete disinterest and lack of reactions from him and strutted over in front of him so he was pretty much forced to give her attention as he did anyone that stood before the throne. Only when she looked at him straight on, did her confident, sultry demeanor stumble. He was no longer the curious, troublesome boy desperate for attention and hungry for power that she knew him to be. What sat before her was a powerful, driven god focused on something beyond her grasp that had far better things to do than be her puppet. His eyes no longer held that shine of youth and excitement and desperation, the darkness of pain and loss replaced it and a glint of danger and power. "What happened to you?"

If he didn't know her like he did, he would've been fooled into thinking she actually sounded concerned about him. He glared as he dropped his gaze to her level but rather than looking at her, he settled for looking through her and wondered in the back of his mind just how many ghosts were haunting the woman in front of him. Midgardians senses were quite weak compared to an Asgardians or a Frost Giant's even but Nell could see things very few people even believed let alone could see for themselves, he wondered what it would be like to look with her eyes. "I grew up."

"So did I yet I'm not I'm remotely as changed as you are."

Loki rolled his eyes again, already done with her prodding antics. "No one's like me."

"Is that so?" she tried to challenge.

He knew without even trying that she was trying to bait him, trying to find some way to connect to him, engage and then string him along like she always did in the past and in the past it worked far too easy for her but he was genuinely tired of her and her antics and was frankly wondering why he fell for her back when he was the student and she was the master. Probably because she offered him more than his foster father ever would and more than his mother was allowed which only further fuel his rage despite both being long dead. He wondered if Frigga had absolute freedom to teach him, just how much she could've if given the chance. He had nearly forgiven his foster father when the old man said he loved him before he died. But then right after that, Thor went back to believing his father was the best of the best and that Loki was the worst of the worst aside from Hela of course and then of course Thor had to ask who she saw around him and old wounds were opened once again. He tried to warn Thor not to pry into such matters and he knew Nell wouldn't have even brought it up if it hadn't been asked from Thor but it still happened so really it all was on Thor for being a bloody thick skulled idiot. Nell wasn't about to lie about something she considered a blessing if not a gift, she embraced her abilities creepy or not, lying about them would be an insult to her, the beings that blessed her with them, and the dead itself. He understood that. "Which one of us is king of this realm and which isn't on a throne of ice?"

"That doesn't mean anything."

"Tell them that then, go on. Tell them that between me being the last son of Laufey and the one that slayed him, that means I have no right to the throne. Tell them how you plotting in the shadows of the realms gives you all the rights in the nine of them or how you were banished from the one realm you called home makes you instantly queen of the others." Loki gave her a very bored, very unamused look to her own glare at him for calling her out, he silently thanked whatever higher powers put him with Nell as he was aware he was starting to pick up on her mannerisms.

"Thanks to you, it's now eight," she snarled.

"Thanks to me, is it? Is that what they're saying these days?" he mused. "You sound just as bad as your once sought after Thor, always blaming me for something I only played a small part of. It was really thanks to Odin not preparing anyone for the coming of his first-born child attempting to take over Asgard and failing thanks to Thor and I. Really, Amora, I thought you were at least smarter than my brother on top of more potent in seidr." It was kind of amusing how Thor despite his countless praise from pretty much the entire realms and then some could still be used as an insult at the same time, big hero small brain. 

"And what are you on top of then?"

"Well as you should have noticed, I'm king of a realm and he's not even king of the country he lives in...if he's still alive."

"Why wouldn't he be?" 

Because I barely survived, Loki thought to himself, and only because I was useful and bendable to him then. Thor would never bend, he would break and then probably die. "Because Thor isn't the worst, the strongest, or the smartest out there, there is always something on top."

"Mmm, who doesn't want to be on top, though?" she purred.

Ever the enchantress she was, Loki mused. She was the exact opposite of Nell who would make the most amusing jokes out of sexual inuendos he loved to counter with his own, Amora didn't hold a candle to that kind of humor, she tried her best to be subtle yet sexual but now that he had heard everything else, she was really a bit blunt and boring about it. "People who are tired of looking down on their equals perhaps." He wondered how Nell would react to meeting his own ex after meeting hers before. Nell often mused about wondering what it would feel like to rip the soul out of someone not from Midgard, he wouldn't be bothered if she did that to Amora honestly, he wondered what would happen then too. Just a simple mortal's soul could be incredible destructive as powerless and weak as they were most of the time, an Asgardian's had to be a doomsday device in her hands. It was then he started to really let it sink in just how powerful his betrothed really was. She really was the end of all things as she steal one person's life and use it to end so many others just by reaching into the first person. And somehow he still wasn't afraid of her and all that she was capable of. That had to be love. 

"Are you saying you wouldn't want to be on top of me?" Amora tried to level.

Loki recalled a certain movie Nell absolutely loved watching during a certain time of year, one of the few movies she loved during that time of year as she hated that season altogether despite it being Loki's best season himself. Begrudgingly, Loki came to love it too, not because Nell loved it but because he understood the main character more than a lot of people that saw that movie probably would themselves. "On top, beneath, whatever position you chose, I still wouldn't touch you with a 39 and a half foot pole."


	18. Gods, Who Runs This Mother?

"You know, a lot of people back on Midgard believe that winter is a father or in simplest terms a dude," I mused to the goddess I was appointed to advise for some reason. "Which doesn't make sense at all, no one in all the realms can be as cold and bitter yet still soft beginning and end like a woman."

Skadi laughed wholeheartedly at my comment and shook her head in amusement while we dined in her great hall. "It slowly thaws my heart that you see it that way, I worried you were as set in your beliefs as the rest of the Midgardians."

"Men in pretty much any realm can be cruel and vindictive and that's why women in any realm can be cold, to numb the cruelty from the men." I can assure you I'm not a hardcore fem-nazi, I'm just really tired of the world being dominated by privileged white dudes. I'm also engaged to a god who isn't actually one gender, little known fact, he's actually pan-sexual and exists as any such gender or creature even he wants to be when he and sometimes I feel like it. You might question then, why is he only ever seen as a hot as fuck white dude. The answer is simple really, let's take a look at where he was raised and who raised him. A realm ruled by an old white dude that literally stole him from his cradle and decided he was better yet still worse as an Asgardian. So realm is ruled by a white dude and who's the next in line and favored by the entire fucking realm after white dude dies/retires? Oh right another white dude. And what about the foster mother, the one he loves most in the family, the one who taught him magic and believed in and loved him despite his "crimes"? She was continuously overruled by her own fucking husband despite being a goddess and queen herself. And let's not forget that the only recognized female warrior in the entire realm is one woman that had to work gods only knows how much harder than any of the dude warriors to get recognized. I don't even know if Sif survived the destruction of Asgard and never thought to ask because as far as Loki told me, she was kinda a meaniepants to all but Thor and her dead friends. If Asgardian women even wore pants... Point is, Loki appears as a really sexy looking white dude because, drum roll please! Wherever he goes, that's how it be. Asgard was all about the big beautiful white dudes, Midgard the realm he was forced to attack still is all about the big white dudes between the white house to the big box companies killing off the smaller businesses. I mean don't get me wrong, Obama isn't like the other Preses, he was badass and different and kinda kickass for his 8 terms, bless him. But as soon as he left office, we were back to being fucked in the ass without lube by none other than white dudes.

"There is a great many things I disagree with my fellow Midgardians on, don't you worry?" I assured the giant goddess and wondered curiously how she felt about snoo snoo.

"Is that why you left your realm and fell to mine?" she asked.

"Kinda the opposite actually, I left my realm in an attempt to find aid on defending it from something far worse than the great white male and in doing so was attacked for that something worse on the way."

"Something worse? Like what or who?"

"I'm not sure, something that I'm willing to bet attacked my realm years before without any of us realizing it was really them and not the puppets they sent to attack us instead. Something that could threaten the entire universe if they succeed in their mission."

"Where were you heading before you fell here?"

I looked up at the goddess completely as it had been a literal uphill struggle trying to pull my eyes away from her ginormous boobs because I might be dead but I was still a bisexual woman that was very easily distracted. "I don't know, I wasn't the one steering the spaceship, I left that to the experts."

"You're not one of them?"

"This was the first time I've ever left my realm and look where that got me, no offense, but I'm not doing that again."

"None taken, I'm well aware of how desolate this realm is which is why it confuses me that you'd land here of all places to choose from."

"This wasn't my choice, right as our ship was attacked I was knocked out and woke up on this planet."

"And rode to my fortress on the back of a snow beast," mused Skadi.

"There's a lot of things I didn't plan on today, let's be honest...and his name is Snowmageddon, the Last Winter."

Skadi arched an eyebrow at the title of my new pet but didn't question it. "You mentioned you came with someone else..."

"He wasn't there when I woke up though," I noted. "And there was no tracks to figure out where he went."

"This other person was a he then. Do you wish to find him?"

"Of course, for many reasons."

"What be the top reason then?"

"Well for one...I'm engaged to him and as a woman I'm not afraid of commitment."

"Is he then? Perhaps he ran from it, from you?"

"I might not be the fastest person but he knows as much as I do that there's no escaping me once I'm locked in. There's also the fact he's more afraid of losing me than he is of committing to me."

"You believe he was taken from you by force then?"

"I'm fairly certain at this point in our relationship, there's nothing, no monster, no demon he wouldn't slay to get to me."

"Such devotion and admiration I hear in your voice when you speak of him, I hope you find him during your stay here."

"You and me both, sister," I mused. "You can't find a god like him back on Midgard and the realm he came from is destroyed so there's no getting a spare back there either."

"And what is he the god of exactly?"

"A few different things, hard to keep track of them all but as long as he's immortal it's all good to me, I'd hate to live forever alone." Or at least live till I've fulfilled my task and reason for being reanimated.

"You're not a god though are you, you don't have that golden glow the others do, I doubt you pull your power from Yggdrasil."

"My power comes from something much darker and stronger, I draw strength from the dead when needed, you're right, I'm not a god. What happens to the dead on this realm?"

"Typically, they turn to ice and shatter into the snow when they perish, both natives and invaders that fall to the ice blade of the Frost Giants."

That definitely explained why I could hear the dead and feel them even but I couldn't see them without using hollow eyes, they couldn't and wouldn't be solid, always incorporeal, always ghosts in the wind becoming amissed. I took a sip of the great big stein of mead I was given as a welcome to her home and damn near choked on the strength of it. "Daeny, mother of dragons, that will grow hair on my chest."

The great winter woman laughed at my reaction wholeheartedly. "It is strong even for the natives, I'll give you that."

"Are you the ruler of this realm?" I asked curiously.

"Nay, for a while this realm actually didn't have an active ruler till recently I've heard, I tried to rule after King Laufey was killed but as I neither slayed him nor am royalty by blood, I don't have any claim to the throne."

"The realms could stand to have more female rulers, I'd vote for you."

"You barely know me."

"True but I'm a great judge of character." Or maybe I'm just a great character, sometimes I get that mixed up. "This new king of the realm, what's he like? Maybe he has the resources to help me find my man and get back to Midgard."

"No one outside of Uttgart knows, he doesn't leave the fortress. What I do know is there's a dangerous sorceress in his counsel that's been here far longer than he has and is not to be trusted with all her knowledge and secrets. Since she appeared on this realm she's been nothing but devious and dangerous but we can't get rid of her."

"Sounds like this planet's close to having a war of the women then, count me in! We'll follow the white snow road, travel to Uttgart, kill a witch, see a king about a man, and be back in Kansas with the click of red heels. Speaking of fashion trends, you wouldn't happen to have something warmer I could wear here, do you?"

I looked at myself in the ice mirror provided, adorned in black leather and brown and black furs and wondered if this was actually Winterfell and not Jotunheim. I got the strangest sense winter was coming but Skadi wasn't nearby and still single to my knowledge and I was spoken for by someone slightly more my size but no less big in the britches nor beautiful. Once I was satisfied with my new outfit, I returned to the great hall where Skadi resided and waited for me and nodded her head with a smile in approval.

"It's lovely, but I fancy myself in autumn," I mused, playing around with the fur collar of my overcoat.

"You look like a proper warrior now, all that's missing is your preferred weapon," Skadi noted.

I considered the weapons I was at least decent in. I wasn't agile and accurate enough for a chinese jian sword sadly, Loki made damn sure to remind me I was crappy with staves of any kind, archery was long range only and once you were out of arrows you were boned, broadswords were despite it name not made for broads like me, shortswords were the same as jian swords just a bit weaker and stiffer to use. Axes and hammers were a bit top heavy for me, threw off my balance entirely. There was one such weapon I hadn't used in a long while, learned it for funsies and because to me it felt like the badass blade of the bunch however cliche it probably was. I was already in black garb, white haired, it was only fitting to wield such a sword as the one I thought of, and complete the whole anime look. I looked up at my host with the most and grinned wickedly. Cue one of the songs on Kill Bill's badass soundtrack. "There is one weapon..."


	19. You Better Work, Witch

You don't miss something till it's gone and something else tries to replace what you miss, that much was certain to Loki. He missed Nell and her off tangent rants/rambles more when Amora was talking and she was always talking, trying to get a reaction, a response from Loki, something to latch onto and probably use on him later. Simply ignoring her didn't seem to work as well as he'd hope, he couldn't get rid of her and he couldn't shake her off him, her personality and character hadn't changed much but she had somehow grown stronger since her own exile and he was still recovering from the crash. 

"How did you end up here?" he muttered, barely throwing her a glance.

"I saw my chance to escape the realm your parents tossed me in when the convergence happened, not even their combined seidr could hold me from that," sneered Amora.

"And you chose this realm why exactly?" he drawled back.

"Wouldn't you like to know," she retorted.

"Not really, but it gets you to stop prattling and change the subject which was my intended goal," Loki countered.

"What else is your goal then? I thought your own throne was your goal yet you sit on edge of the one given to you live it's the worst seating you've ever had."

"What do you care of my ambitions?"

"Perhaps we could help each other reach them?" she suggested.

"Like you promised to last time we were together and you got yourself banished and me losing favor with Odin, as the Midgardians would say hard pass there. It's always about you want in the end and throwing me into the line of fire when you don't get it when I had nothing to do with your failures." Loki stood up from his throne then and while Amora was tall for a woman, Loki being at least part Frost Giant still made him taller than her. Even in his weakened state between his height, his dark yet burning gaze and the leftover magic that sparked and crackled around him, he was a force to be reckoned with. "Of all my exes, you were the one I wished I'd killed when I had the chance." Loki wondered if all blondes were this selfish as she was, Thor certainly was in his younger years, Nell's ex despite not being naturally blond seemed that way too. Not to mention the blond demon she brought with her. And let's not forget Odin himself was blond in his much much much younger centuries had to be blond as well and he sure as hell wasn't known for looking out for anyone but himself. 

"Why don't you do it now then?" challenged Amora, breaking him from his thoughts.

His magic was all but depleted but he still had his strength and he had her by the throat against a wall of ice in seconds, skin suddenly icy and blue, eyes burning red like Hel itself as he glared at her. "Is this what you want, witch? Is this what you've been waiting for on this realm all this time? For someone that actually knows you to put you out of your misery? You never struck me as the masochistic type, more the other end of that spectrum if memory serves me as well as it does."

"And what side of it are you on?" she purred back.

He squeezed her throat tighter then. "The side where I survive and you don't."

"Why am I a threat to you when we've only just been reacquainted?"

"No amount of time will change how dangerous you are to everyone and anyone around you." A dagger slid out of his sleeve and into his free hand. Before he could plunge into her chest where he hoped her heart was if she still had one however, he was sent flying back and struck another wall of ice, crumbling after. "My point exactly." He slowly got to his feet with a wince, brushing himself off and continually glaring at her. He couldn't kill her as long as she had magic and he was still depleted of it, if he had his loyal Frost Giants attack her she'd just kill them like she almost killed him just then, he really needed Nell on this one. He was also a bit curious how that would play out, the ex and the fiancee battling each other. Loki was aware of how Midgardian male that sounded, wanting to watch a past and present woman fighting each other like something out of a bad rom com or teen movie but Amora claimed to be the most power sorceress in all nine realms, second only to Queen Karnilla of course and then there was Nell, a horseman that would bring about the end of Midgard that could raise an undead army as if she even needed one being death itself. A woman who was also already dead to begin with for who knows how long, was also immortal, and could rip the soul out of anyone within her grasp. If he couldn't stop Amora, Nell would have no problem with her and Loki was already longing to see that platinum blond bitch get her ass handed to her. He just needed to find her again, just like he had found her in the beginning at the bottom of a Hydra base.

He remembered vividly that day, that moment. Having easily disposed of the agents attempting to trap or kill him as well and slipping past their feeble defenses, he was quick to seek out what they were hiding down there. In a giant container made of impenetrable glass and adamantium with vibranium shackles bolted to the floor was a lithe figure in a tattered black cloak, on their knees and unmoving. Loki didn't need to hack Hydra's database to know this creature was feared and powerful considering all the security measures and secrecy. Loki had extended the smallest tendril of seidr to get a sense of just how powerful they were without disturbing or alerting them but even that sliver of magic stirred what was inside and the palest grey eyes locked on Loki's instantly from the dark shadows of the hood, they almost glowed from the darkness that helped shroud the creature. Loki didn't know what to expect once he alerted this being but it certainly wasn't what came out next. At first glance, one would see a walking female corpse but that was seemed almost as much an illusion as Loki looking Asgardian when he was really a Frost Giant, Nell was sublime, she had such a lethal beauty to her for all her self deprecating corpse jokes. It wasn't like she was rotting away or skeletal or bloated like an actual corpse would become at some point, death became her. It was only when she was in attack mode or zombie mode as she called it that she was truly frightening. And yet he didn't fear her, he loved her that much more watching his woman almost literally raise hell without hesitation or regret. She knew what she was, loved it, owned it even, and didn't hold back. Most importantly though, she was his, his queen of the zombies as Tony would call her, his goddess of the apocalypse, his fiancee, and his love. 

No one could've predicted she would be his one and only, some believed dark gods would be drawn to the light, those that believed in and fought for the greater good. Others believed they preferred kindred spirits, as he did at one point himself, having fallen for Amora who pretty much brought the darkness out of him and all but smothered him in it. But Nell was neither as death was neither good or bad, the only really true neutral, it didn't care whose side you were on, it came for you all the same, it was like the meaning of Christmas to the Whos of Whoville as Nell had once explained to him during Jim Carrey's version. Neutrals were the best in his opinion anyway, you couldn't disappoint them and they in turn couldn't make you change your ways for them. Nell didn't want him to be a better man or better god, she didn't want him to be evil or corrupt either like a certain enchantress most likely wanted. She just wanted him as he was, nothing more nothing less, she chose him as he was not as he could be if provoked or convinced. 

"Who is she?" demanded Amora, interrupting him from his thoughts.

"Is that jealousy I hear in your otherwise mewling voice?" Loki sneered. "I haven't confirmed nor denied such accusation and already you're out for this other woman's blood. What do you care who I bed or consort with? You'd happily sell me off to the highest bidder if it meant the key to realm domination in return."

She thrust out her hand either to slap him or attack him with magic but he was quicker and simply snapped her wrist, stopping her move in an instant as she shrieked in pain. Loki recalled Nell doing that to the first turncoat necromancer she faced after being freed by the Avengers. Of course that idjit had a necromancer's dagger aiming at her business end first but she wasn't having any of that. Loki was constantly surprised by how well she actually fought when in battle, she didn't come off as a seasoned warrior but then again she was the exact opposite Thor and Loki saw him as an absolute seasoned warrior. She had no battle cry aside from when she was calling an entire horde of zombies to war, she didn't charge head first into the fight, didn't go around bashing anything within reach. She waited, watched for an opportune moment, usually taunted the opponent into making the first move, and then attacked after. That was her game, piss them off with trash talking so they are too riled up to make a properly thought out move and take them down then. No, she wasn't the opposite of Thor, she was a combination of both Thor and Loki, she wasn't actually quiet during a battle, something Thor excelled in, but she was still calculated and clever in her attacks like Loki. Definitely a neutral if she was both of them combined. Damn he missed her. 

Amora cradled her broken wrist before fixing it with magic and glaring at the king who in turn gave her a bored look. "Where'd you learn that little trick?"

"No trick, you've just become so predictable that even with my seidr being limited I could stop you in your tracks."

Amora shrieked again and stormed off, finally leaving Loki alone to his thoughts. He brushed himself off and reached out in front of him in an attempt to call forth his magic but instead of bright green swirls coming from him, only a few green sparks popped up like when Thor first realized he didn't need Mjolnir to be the god of thunder. It shouldn't take that long to recover between being a demi god and honorary Asgardian and yet there he was damn near mortal since he landed. 

Amora on the other hand marched to a secret chamber hidden within the castle where a figure cloaked in shadows and other shady things was waiting for her. "This isn't working!"

"Did you think it would be easy keeping him weakened, he's not some second rate sorcerer we're dealing with here! He's a god, this planet's king, and is part of something I can neither compete with nor take out of the equation. What's more than him alone being inexplicably powerful himself, there's something else here growing in power that's hindering my ability to mute his power."

"Where and what is this other power?"

"Within the Frozen Forest. Not sure what its coming from specifically but what I do know is that this power source is dark, and old and it could very well overpower yourself."

"It must be Skadi, hiding in her little forest fortress and amassing power now that we've chosen a rightful ruler of this realm, that icy witch has been after the throne since Laufey was killed. I'll have my spies look into the source of her power growing and destroy it." As the other creature sank back into the shadows it came from, Amora sent an illusion of herself to her spies chambers. "Skadi is showing her true colors now that we have a proper ruler of the realm, find out where its coming from and destroy it at will. She has become a threat to our king and his kingdom!" Amora had all the pieces in the right places and she would do anything and everything to see her plan to fruition, this realm was hers for the taking and no winter woman was going to stop her.


	20. Ice To Meat You

When one is immortal and not even a blade or any kind of sharp object to the heart/chest/abdomen or throat even kills you, one doesn't tend to care what kind of attention their other powers attracts because nothing is really a threat to them if they're dead and unkillable. Loki had told me he could feel how powerful I was when we first met at the Hydra base even with me being shackled to the floor in an unbreakable glass container. If I really wanted to, I could cloak that power emanating from me and just come off as a zombie rather than a zombie boss ass bitch that I am. But why hide what I was re-animated to be? If you got it, flaunt it. So that's what I did and it always seemed to attract the most interesting moths to my cold dead light. Sometimes it was a bunch of crazy scientists after mass destruction, sometimes it was a really sexy space Viking, and sometimes it was a bunch of Frost Giants that clearly weren't Mother Winter worshipers. I'm sure to other bigass beings on this realm they were considered sneaking and stealthy but when you're already vertically challenged among your own kind in your own realm, it becomes super easy to see if not just sense things way bigger than you. Case and point, Loki. Sometimes size is everything and more.

The first Frost Giant to attack came at me with a dagger entirely made of ice which seems a bit stupid considering how easy it is to break ice, so naturally I cut off his knife wielding hand and slashed his abdomen with my shiny new blade Skadi made for me. Two more came at me from the other side, I dodged the first one's weapon, dropping to my knees to slash his legs so he crashed to the ground only to have my blade go into his spine while I parried the second one's blade with my ceremonial dagger before dropping it into my other hand and stabbing them hard in the heart. That's when the fourth one came at me head on and as I didn't have time to take the blades I possessed out of their current positions, I opted for my last resort and a skeletal hand thrust out and into the oncoming chest attached to the rest of the fourth giant and latched onto the heart of the matter. The giant screamed in agony enough to send the rest of them running but I didn't let go nor yank it out as I wasn't quite done with my target just yet.

"Why did you attack me?" I demanded.

"You're a threat to the new king, his advisor sensed your immense power immediately and ordered you and Skadi to be eliminated," the giant hissed.

"Look into my eyes and tell me if you think that's still an option," I growled.

The giant did and when red met milky white his own widened in horror. "You're the missing part of the prophecy."

"I'm sorry, what?" I almost dropped him in utter confusion.

"I yield, please let me go!"

"So you can return to this king and tell him what you found? Hell naw. Though I am betting as long as I'm here, his adviser can still sense my presence so my best course of action would be to go to them and you're going to help me with that. But first you're going to tell me everything about the new king and his magical adviser."

The spy was handed over to the owner of the estate Skadi as this was her place, her home, her planet even to be dealt with as she saw fit. As for myself, I was going going get to Uttgart armed and furious on the back of my new ride Snowmaggedon. If there was one thing I learned from Loki it was how to make an entrance in style, and that style was Miss Behaving. Oh and go big then go home, that's important too. First thing though I had to cloak my presence and power so as to not alert this magical adviser I was still undead and kicking, the plan no longer involved meeting with the king and demanding Loki, I was going to sneak into the castle another way and sniff him out then getting the hell off this Frosted Flake, if anyone can get us off here, it was the magic wielding Frost Giant with a penchant for trouble. He already knew how to get me off in more than one way, how hard could it be? I shuddered just thinking about a few of those ways before putting my focus back on the matter at hand. 

I thought Skadi's home was massive, the capitol was scary ginormagantuan. Narnia had nothing on this winter wasteland, no talking animals, no fantastical magic to thaw it out, no great lion with Liam Neeson's voice that not so secretly is a representation of Christ. I had yet to see a battle chariot drawn by armored polar bears. I did however see the whole castle crawling with the unquiet incorporeal dead on top of the living guards at every noticeable entrance. I might not be able to raise the dead physically here but I could sure as hell still talk to them. I slowed down my ride and climbed off him to greet my potential allies, speaking to them in a language only the dead can even hear let alone understand.

"Hey, you wanna keep doing what you're doing and getting nowhere or do you wanna have some fun before you enter the afterlife?" I asked them.

A spook giant that was neither the biggest nor widest turned his attention toward me and glared. "Who are you, midgardian, that speaks to us?"

"I'm a necromancer which is why I can not only speak to you but for you and so much more. What is it that keeps you here haunting this castle?"

"This is our realm, we cannot leave it to just anyone to watch over it and someone all the realms should be wary of has taken hold of ours."

I studied the giant curiously. "Who am I addressing now?"

"I am Laufey, former king of Jotenheim."

I grinned madly. "Ah, I wondered if I'd ever get to meet my real father in law. I can and will help you make sure this realm is looked after, but you and I need to have a talk after that's all settled. I can give you some of my strength and some of your voice to be heard and seen by the living, those of you that want this realm back. I just need you to show me where the hidden entrances are so I can get in there without much trouble and catch this new rule by surprise, so they won't be expecting anything from us."

"Why are you so willing to help us?" demanded Laufey suspiciously.

"I want to get off this realm and back to my own and I've a feeling the way out is from within. I'm also looking for someone in there and I'm not leaving this place without them. So do we have a deal?"

"Agreed," the ghost growled.

"Groovy, then by the power vested in me by...higher powers that be, I invite you to hop in and show me the way to go home." I opened up my arms in a welcome gesture and the ghost flew at me and into my body. You know that feeling you get when you just had some spearmint gum or a breath mint and then take a gulp of cold water? That's kinda what it felt like being possessed by a dead Frost Giant but with your whole body not just your mouth and throat feeling the arctic blast. "Now that's what I call refreshing. Whoa." Let's get frosty.


	21. Call to the Void

Loki felt like an idiot for not seeing his mistake sooner. Amora was entirely too smug whenever she strolled in to where he brooded and recovered, the woman had the worst poker face and no chill. This was supposed to be his home planet too, he should be even stronger on this realm than any other and yet he could barely make a decent double. She not only was definitely working an angle but she was working an angle with an accomplice or rather she was probably the accomplice as she clearly wasn't that powerful as he could still crush her with physical force if he really wanted to. Of course that wasn't his way, that was his brother's and he sure as hell wasn't that angry bag of meat and muscles. According to a giant angry green bag of meat and muscles he was just a bag of cats. Having experience being a "owner" of what Nell insists is still a cat despite the mouth full of tentacles, he was starting to take that aforementioned insult as more a compliment, those kinds of pussies you don't want to fuck with. 

She either was the cause of why he was still weakened in his homeworld or at least knew the cause of it and he was going to squeeze it out of her and restore himself if it was the last thing he did. He did not survive the wrath of the Mad Titan only to wither away to an ex on a frozen planet, he had already saved Nell from that fate not too long ago, he could do that for himself as well. Having posed as Odin, he was long since done sitting around on his arse on a throne all day and expecting things to just fix themselves, he stood up, gritted his teeth and did something different for a change. As his Asgardian magical side was suppressed beyond his control, he would have to resort to his less favorable side, neither Amora nor any other sorcerer could touch, his Jotun side. He had a feeling that hanging onto that form as he had been was part of the problem as that was magically charged and thus burning through his reserved seidr. The second he dropped it, he felt stronger, refreshed even, like some heavy burden was thrown off him and he could stand straight and strong for once. His "guards" that were stationed with him at all times "for his protection as king" noticed his change immediately and their barely concealed contempt for him changed to something closer to respect, they were no longer under Asgardian rule but one of their own. Loki took note of this too and swallowed his disgust at his true form, even with all the times Nell looked at him with such awe and curiosity when he showed this form, he still wasn't happy with it...till now. Loki looked down at his guards who barely met his gaze before bowing their heads in respect. Good, at least he had some people on his side now. "Where is that sorceress staying in this castle and who or what is she with?" he snarled at his new followers.

He found her in a secret meeting room he hadn't known about but the guards sure as hell did, talking to a cloaked figure, two similarly cloaked figures on either side of the first one. Of course those were only the important and powerful people in the room, they too had their own guards/henchmen as well which would complicate things a bit as it was just him and his two guards against four other magic wielders and their backup.

"The plan is set, the outside power source we know to be Skadi has been eliminated and the king's power has all but diminished, we have felt it both happen," the first cloaked figure hissed.

"Then the realm is ours, Loki has no power to rule, only a face and blood and no one shall oppose us," sneered Amora confidently.

"As long as there's a Frost Giant on the throne, they won't question his and thus our commands, we just have to instill our will upon him and this realm is indeed ours for the taking. Our master has done it once before with him, had it not being for that planet's defenders he would've succeeded too," the second cloaked figure spoke up.

"We do not have the scepter though, that was taken by those defenders after his failure to take over," the third reminded the first two.

"No matter, we have enough power with him weakened and his powers suppressed to overpower him ourselves," the first argued. "It is done."

"Is it though?" growled Loki from his shadowed hiding spot, eyes glowing red with fury.

"My love!" cried Amora in a feeble attempt to stall him or calm him down.

"As if you ever could feel that toward anyone but yourself," Loki scoffed as he stepped out of the shadows and closer to the four usurpers. "You lot only managed to cut off one part of what I am and in doing so unleashed the part you really should've targeted first. As my ex can attest, Frost Giants are the biggest monsters of the Nine Realms, even the Allfather couldn't snuff them out for good."

"Is that really how you want to be seen as a king? A great monster?" Amora tried to interject.

"Considering the realm I'm currently king of, I wouldn't be seen as such to them, I'd be one of them instead. You on the other hand are the hated beast in this realm and that's why you couldn't ever take the throne for yourself. It must burn you inside being this close to having a seat of power but never being able to sit in it yourself, Odin took the Asgardian one, then Thor after him, Karnilla for Nornheim, and now myself for this realm, so many realms you were a hair's width away from getting." If there was one thing he knew about his ex, it was as long as she distraught she wasn't at her best in sorcery and it wasn't that hard to get her riled up as she was at least ten times more full of jealousy than he would ever be. "Case and point, you need three more magical beings just to sedate me, you've gotten rusty it seems since we last saw each other, I remember a time all it took was the right look and a few choice words to string me along. Who are you anyway that knows of the attack on Midgard?"

The first of the three figures took a step forward and snapped their fingers and the room was suddenly lit by magical torches that came from the walls, revealing three similar ancient wrinkled faces. "You might not know us but we know you well, Loki Laufeyson, we foresaw your fall from the bifrost and alerted our master you would be the perfect puppet to test the Mind Stone with."

"Thanos," Loki snarled. 

"Won't he be surprised when we tell him you've once more escaped his punishment and are under our control till he finishes what he started before you crashed here," the second witch threatened.

"I am not his main objective, as soon as he gets what he's really after, he'll use it then retire, even I know that and I wasn't one of his 'children' he collected from his warpath. Besides, don't you need me alive to keep this realm under your rule? That won't happen if you hand me over to him, Jotunheim needs a Frost Giant on the throne, you said so yourself."

"Oh we've already planned for that, with your blood, our magic, and the body of a giantess we've kept as prisoner for rebelling, we'll create an heir under our complete control from the moment its born," the third spoke up.

Loki had forgotten that just because his beloved couldn't ever produce children, that he'd never be able to have any of his own. However, the very thought of history repeating itself through him with a child being stolen from its parents and used and controlled by a dangerous power yet again made his blood boil if that were even possible in his current form. A sword of ice and fury appeared and grew from his hand as he took another step toward them. "You want my blood, come and get it." He would rather they kill him first before creating an offspring to be used just like he had been and then thrown like leftovers for Thanos to finish off.

The Coven just cackled in their extremely stereotypical wicked witch way. "All in due time, but first we'll use you till there's nothing left but a shell of what you once were." All three of them raised their hands and red/pink lightning danced and crackled around them as they summoned their powers together while their henchmen advanced with their weapons all pointed at Loki and his two measly royal guards.

Loki knew the Coven was the biggest threat to him in the room so that was where he had to focus on though the henchmen were the ones closing in on him and they couldn't be any more dangerous than Malekith's small army he had fought against while Thor took on Kurse. There was also still the issue of big blond elephant in the room who hadn't done much since his arrival but watch him converse with her new bosses. Would she just continue to stand there and watch or go against him as well? Who to attack first? It was then that the torch lights blew out and in fact any kind of light to the point even the magic the Coven was showing off was dimmed and the room was swallowed in almost complete darkness. Loki was thankful his true form gave him night vision but even as he could still see the Coven, their henchmen, and Amora, he couldn't figure out the cause of the sudden darkness. That's when things got interesting as he could definitely hear the muffled grunt of shock and pain followed by a heavy thump on the floor and turned to see one of the henchmen crumble lifeless and bloody. Amora turned to where they had fallen but neither she nor Loki could see who or what had done it, that's when another body fell opposite of where they were looking, but rather than a gaping chest wound it was a sliced throat. Cackles and screeches were heard throughout the room before all and any entrances and exits to it were all shut and locked by unseen forces. Loki couldn't shake the feeling he had seen this sort of thing on TV before, in a horror movie or show. 

"Enough!" shrieked Amora, clearly rattled but trying her best to hide it with barely believable bravado. She thrust out a hand to relight the room, revealing all the henchmen were dead on the floor in a puddle of their own blood. That was all changed as she screamed in sheer pain, a dagger suddenly impaling her outstretched hand and pinning it to the wall behind her, thus encasing the room in darkness once more.

"You think darkness will scare us? We are part of the Black Order of Thanos, who are you?" demanded one of the Coven.

Another cackle then, different from the others that echoed everywhere in the room, this one was solid. "There is no order here, only organized chaos." The voice everyone heard was deep and raspy but the one only Loki heard that he could've sworn was whispered in his ear at the same time wasn't as deep, almost feminine. The room went dead silent, not even a heartbeat or breath could be heard, it was damn near deafening. Then all at once a great ball of nothing, like a head sized black hole charged with black lightning dancing around it that flew right for the three hags, sending them scattering in different directions and halting their own built up attack that was aimed at Loki. "Hello, my name is Nell, you stole my fiancee...prepare to die."


	22. The Liesmith, the Witches, and the Warrior

"Ello, poppet. Loving the new look, ooh you used my idea for a crown too, so proud," I chirped happily. I allowed my powers to burst forth, showing my targets their hounds didn't kill me when they sniffed me out. "Y'all thought a few assassins could take out this much power? Witch, please."

"Noelle," breathed Loki with such relief it actually made my heart ache hearing my full name on his lips for once.

"Miss me?" I cooed.

"I thought you were dead."

I blinked and arched an eyebrow at him. "I've been that for a while, sugarpants, that's not news."

Loki scowled at me though the relief I was still kicking was breaking the look of scorn he was trying to hold on me. 

"Loki, who is that?!" demanded the tall blond I had pinned to the wall.

"I already told you who I am, that's on you for not paying attention," I told her lightly. "Btdubs, if you want to keep your other hand, you wont pull that dagger out of it or it'll eat your remaining one upon touch. That is the only handout you'll get from me, Tits Magee." I looked at Loki's ex curiously, long blond hair, massive boobs that didn't quite look as fun as Skadi's big ones, long green gown and matching crown, light tan. "One more thing we got in common, power hungry blond ex girlfriends, yours might be worse, you win."

"Darling, you have no idea," Loki mused back. "I'm so glad you're still walking."

"Loki, you got a lot of splaining to do after this. First things first though, you hags gotta go, you're making the cool witches back home look back." I turned my back to Loki, making sure I was between them and him. 

The three hags stood up, all summoning power into their hands but I was having none of that and rushed the first one, unsheathing my katana and slicing off a hand of power in one swift fluid motion. I then flicked off the hag's hand blood and turned to the other two. "Which one of you crones has Loki's powers on pause or is it Blondzilla over there I gotta rip it out of?" Half my body went skeletal then, no holding back now when potentially four targets were powerful mages and all four were also aliens. "Doesn't matter really, none of you are getting out of this room alive because on top of attempting treason and usurping the throne, you're using my favorite person as a tool and that seriously pisses me off." Death magic danced along the long blade of my sword from my hand. The two other hags then attacked with their magic directed at me but was deflected by my sword like a Jedi deflecting a Sith's lightning with their lightsaber. "My turn." I let go of the sword with one hand and thrust it at them right back, death magic shooting from my hand and sending them both flying back into a wall. 

"What are you?" demanded the one handed witch that was actually magically regrowing her missing hand.

"Give you a hint, and on that note I should thank you for bringing guards that aren't Frost Giants into the mix as I can't seem to resurrect snow." With my outstretched hand I simply raised higher, palm up and the guards of the witches I had all killed in the dark, stood up, dead and deader. "Is that all you brought with you though? A small handful of henchmen and some crazy ex girlfriend to take over an entire realm? What would Thanos think? He sent the most powerful sorcerer and an entire army of space bugs to try and take out mine."

"I'm not crazy!" shrieked the ex mentioned, thus proving my point.

"Exactly what a crazy person would say, they don't know they're crazy that's why they're crazy."

She cursed at me in a language that definitely wasn't Allspeak and summoned a knife with her free hand and swiftly cut off the hand pinned to the wall, already magically regrowing the one she just lost, did everyone here know how to do that or just evil witches? I frowned seeing I still had to deal with her and held my sword in front of me while reaching behind to summon my dagger from the wall since it was no longer doing its job of keeping her at bay. Crazy Ex then charged at me while I still had my eyes on the other three witches but Loki stepped forward then with his sword of ice, not wanting to miss out on the action. I relaxed the slightest bit seeing he was taking action on her, I had bigger witches to fry. The three witches stood together and glanced at one another.

"Someone that can command armies will either be a threat or an asset to Thanos depending on the side she's on," the first one noted.

"And I don't need a fancy gold glowstick of destiny to do it either, unfortunately for you lot, I don't side with angry humanoid grapes that want to destroy the universe. I won't be a threat to Thanos, I'll be his end."

"You don't know what you'll be up against not siding with the Mad Titan."

"Well he sounds mad so I got that much to go with at least and he doesn't know what he's up against as it's not just the most powerful sorcerer and necromancer that's going to stop him, see I'm not the only one here that will lead an army against him. He couldn't even take over a city on my planet."

"He didn't have all the Infinity Stones then, now he will and you'll all be dust before you even face him yourself," sneered another witch.

"Which implies even you admit I'll be around after dealing with you three, loving that vote of confidence, usually it's my immediate opponent that believes they'll stop me in the end." Before the witches could take back their words or correct me on technicalities however, I attacked, deflecting their magic with my sword and sending my own magic at them with a skeletal hand.

Loki was faring similarly with his ex, dodging and deflecting her attacks with his usual poise and grace while she attempted to shun his more primal side like Asgardians would over a Frost Giant, calling him what was probably their equivalent of racial slurs comparing him to monsters and beasts of old. This however didn't deter or downplay his ferocity, he merely growled in annoyance and continued his attacks, he had long since cared about anyone's approval, long since cared what anyone thought of him, especially since the one person that really truly mattered to him loved all his sides, the colder one and the royal one. And now he was a bit of both being the king of the Frost Giants, this was his turf, his domain, what kind of king would he be if he couldn't defend it. The former king before him had defended it against himself and his brother's friends with ease, he should be able to defend it against a few power hungry witches after all. 

"Double, double, you're in trouble, out of your throat your blood will bubble," I sang as I advanced on the closest witch, deflecting her magic then thrust my sword straight through her chest and yanking it out swiftly in a spray of blood.

The other two witches screamed in agony as if they were the ones I just attacked which meant they were all in one way or another linked together as some actual covens tend to be. That's when I noticed a curious thing that seemed out of place on all three of them, a single pendant worn around their neck with a green stone on their otherwise plain if not stereotypical black cloaks. Three guesses says that's where Loki's godly power was being kept from him, seems a certain Strange wizard wasn't as original in his schemes as he thought. Simply killing them wouldn't give him back his power and the witches wouldn't let me grab those pendants while they were still living, there was always a catch. That's when Loki was sent flying back by a blast of white hot magic and it clicked of course heat would be a Frost King's downfall, that had to be how that witch survived this realm and its locals this whole time she was on it or they would've gotten rid of that Asgardian scum. As strong as he was, Loki couldn't hold off the heat ray for much longer it looked like, his ice sword was actually beginning to drip as he tried to deflect it. If I simply tossed him my sword it would hold off her attack but he'd still be in hot water pun intended. Without his magic, he didn't have as good a chance at winning as she did it seemed. There was only one way I could take them all on in one go as I wasn't Neo and couldn't just stick a bo staff into the ground and swing around it kicking their collective asses as I went. Time to get my hands on godly powers. I gripped both hands on the hilt of my sword for stability as the remaining two witches shot power at me once more before sending their own power plus mine right back at them but also at the ceiling above, forcing them back and giving me time to direct my next attack on Loki's ex before the ice dust settled. Her back was to me as she continued her assault on Loki, his sword now more a dagger with an unnecessarily large hilt and his strength visibly waning from the heat of her attack. I had to act quickly and precisely then, the other two witches could also return their assault at any given second on not just myself but Loki as his back was to them, if I killed the ex the easy and traditional way they'd still have time to return the blows, it had to be done all at once. I lowered my sword and relaxed my posture to keep out of the target's immediate line of sight before shoving one skeletal hand through her back and into her chest, fingers closing around her soul in an adamantium grip.


	23. Skols and Bones

There was so much raw power in my grasp my entire body went skeletal to keep from frying myself or maybe it was because that much power instantly unleashed my last and strongest form. She of course stopped burning Loki where he stood, stopped pretty much everything she was doing in favor of screaming in blood curdling agony as that's all that she could comprehend when death was clutching her soul. I went into action, siphoning that power in my hand, dropping my sword and kicking it to Loki just in case as he regained strength not being burned alive, and channeling that raw Asgardian life magic into my other hand that went right to the remaining two witches mixed with my own as a Horsemen. They attempted to shield themselves with their own magic that was the first thing obliterated from them, then their clothes, their flesh, till they were nothing but charred skeletons with pretty green pendants left that crumbled lifelessly to the ground. I looked past my prey to Loki for confirmation, the immediate bigger threat was done and gone, what should be done with the one I held in my grasp? He lifted my sword and nodded at me once our eyes locked. I squeezed her soul harder and yanked right as he drove my sword into her chest, our eyes not leaving each other as we finished her off together. The screaming stopped as did her life and she fell dead at our feet. 

"This belongs to you, I believe," Loki murmured, handing me back my sword hilt first.

I grinned as only skeletons do, I took it, flicked off her blood from my blade like a samurai would then swiftly sheathed it at my hip. "Then let me be your sword, King Loki." I reached up with a clean yet still all bony hand and cupped his cool, blue and ridged face.

"No flesh, no hair even and yet I'm still in awe of all you are," Loki noted in admiration. "Is this what you'd thought I'd be afraid?"

"There's a bit more than this you've not yet seen but this sums it up more or less," I told him. "Scared yet?"

"Never, my love. Though I'll admit you really are the queen of halloween here, Jackie Skellington."

I grinned wider. "I'm not sure if that was a compliment or a jest but either way, I love it still." I pulled away reluctantly and crushed his exes soul still in my other hand, some of it dissipated, the rest I absorbed for later use, then walked over to the charred skeletons and the somehow still alive third witch despite me shoving a sword through her and snatched the three identical pendants keeping Loki's god power from him. "Would've thought you'd just die after seeing your sisters burnt to a crisp. These belong to you, Loki." I held up the necklaces for him as my mortal form returned, having had my fun as miss bones. Loki took them all in his hands and crushed them and green magic swirled through him, healing his injuries and refreshing him from being toasted alive, he stood up straighter yet looked more relaxed then. He then turned to his guards at the entrances, still in his true form.

"Take this hag to be executed immediately and have your best and most trusted Jotuns sort out anymore traitors and usurpers that followed Amora or the Coven, we're taking this realm back."

The two guards nodded and bowed before grabbing hold of the remaining witch and dragging her away. My reanimated guards took the remaining bodies out of the room as well before crumbling as I had no use for them after that. I breathed out and my internal guide to the castle, aka Loki's pops shimmered into view in front of me. "Though we may be small, beware for we are mighty."

"My kingdom is yours now, defend it, restore it as only you can, do not let it fall as Asgard did, Yggdrasil cannot remain strong if the realms continue to crumble around it. Loki, use the Casket to keep this realm strong in your rule and prove to the son of Odin that we are not the monsters parents tell their young about at night. We are fierce, we are strong, and we are ready." With that, he shimmered out of sight and was gone to the afterlife, presumably Valhalla.

"You contacted Laufey?" Loki asked after a stunned silence had followed.

"He was haunting this place, unfinished business with who sits on the throne. Now that that's squared away, he should be at peace with the snow angels. Also, you had the Casket this whole time and you didn't choose to freeze their asses?"

"I couldn't get access to my pocket dimensions, that requires magic they all but snuffed out upon dragging me here," Loki explained.

"Seems the key to kicking your ass is stealing your mojo," I teased.

"Amora's powers weren't enough for you getting a hold of?" he retorted.

"She clearly wasn't enough for you, why would she be enough for me? You're the real deal here. An Asgardian prince, a deity, a king of Frost Giants, and most importantly my fiance, you'll suffice."

"Oh is that right? I'll suffice, meaning you're just going to settle for me then."

"Would you rather I not stop at you and continue the hunt for a perfect warm body to snack on?"

"To snack on? Of the two of us, who's eating who most of the time here?"

"If I start on you now, I'll get the worst case of brain freeze yet and I'm cold enough just being dead."

"Insatiable woman," Loki growled in a way that certain usually dead parts come alive at the sound.

"You love it though so it all works out in the end." I looked around us curiously. "I think we're alone now, there doesn't seem to be anyone around," I sang.

Loki smirked and closed the distance between us, green magic swirling around us and suddenly we stood in what had to his royal bedroom. "This is better, is it not?"

"You know fur is murder," I mused, looking at all the fur bedding.

"You're one to talk, look at your shoulder armor which I must say makes you look ravishing as a shieldmaiden, I like this new look so much more than anything myself or Stark concocted."

I grinned madly at the compliment. "I'm kinda digging it too, think your Norse followers were the first people to consider women being as much warriors as the men."

"Unfortunately, Odin didn't see it that way in Asgard, Sif and the Valkyrie were the only known women warriors of the realm."

I scoffed. "Losers. Don't know what they're missing."

"And they won't as long as I'm still standing, I missed you more than words can say," Loki purred.

I arched an eyebrow smugly. "Prove it."

Loki growled again before crushing my lips with his own in a hungry kiss, holding me tightly against him as if I'd slip from his grasp again. If I had air in my lungs, it would've been knocked out by how much went into that kiss, so much longing and pain and relief all in one action. He then picked me up without breaking the kiss, encouraging me to wrap my legs around his waist before setting me on the bed, his fingers clawing up my skirts greedily. He nipped my lower lip and pulled away from the kiss right as he buried himself in me, causing me to gasp and arch back, gods how I missed him. It didn't matter to me anymore that we were potentially stranded on a frozen planet who knows how far from home, all I needed was Loki by my side and nothing else bothered me. We were one, two halves joined together in the best way.


	24. You Should See Me in a Crown

Loki sat at his throne once more like a bossass bitch, crown, blue skin, red eyes and all the magic he'd ever had and needed. Before him stood clan leaders of the Frost Giants, council members, and the Volva, the mystics of the realm. I stood beside him as an advisor and right hand of the king if this was Winterfell, despite being his betrothed, I didn't want to be royalty in any way, shape, or form, far too much stress involved and I was deathly allergic to stress. The Volva eyed me where I stood with interest, the rest of the people not so much as they didn't know nor trust what I was even as I stood by and protected their king. 

"This might not be ideal but this is what we set out to do," I mused to Loki quietly. "We left to find allies and here we are with some ready to fight by your side."

"Sometimes your optimism worries me," Loki murmured. "But you have a point and as we've yet to find a way off this realm, we should take what we can get now and build on that. Will you be okay living here till we find a way off?"

I chewed my lip in thought. "I miss Zari and Catalie, I really hope they'll be okay without me and you can bet I won't be pleased to miss my favorite holiday for the umpteenth time but things could be worse I suppose. You better be ready to make all that up to me, you realize."

"Are you making demands of your king already?" Loki teased.

"You're my fiance but you aren't my king, hun. I answer to powers higher than yours and them only."

"As long as you're mine in the end."

I grinned and raised a hand to show off the ring he had given me before this whole fiasco started and we were still on Earth. "You know I am, I said yes, didn't I?"

Loki glared at the ring. "That should've led me to you this whole time we were apart. What good is an enchanted gem if it doesn't do its job?"

"It does look really pretty and sparkles just like your eyes do when you have a wicked thought."

"You little charmer." Loki took my outstretched hand and kissed it tenderly before letting it go and facing the council and clearing his throat in a growl. "Any objections to my place on the throne?"

"None, King Loki," one of the clan leaders spoke up quickly.

"Is there any grievances you wish to convey to me otherwise?" Loki pushed on.

"There are some among the clansmen about the woman by your side," he spoke.

That's when the eldest of the Volva stepped forward and turned to the clansman. "We wish to stand with the woman by your side, King Loki, for she is part of the prophecy we have foreseen."

"What have you foreseen exactly?" Loki demanded at the edge of his seat.

"Death will follow the one true king as he falls from the sky to our aid and when death finds him, it will not take him as it does his enemies but stand his equal and follow his lead. The guards that witnessed the end of the usurpers confirmed exactly what we have seen, this woman that stands beside our king is more than just a loyal shieldmaiden to you and to anyone that stands against her. So we stand with you King Loki but also with her, Hel Skugga."

"What did she just call me?" I whispered to Loki.

"Death's shadow," Loki translated before nodding in respect to the Volva. "If you stand with my betrothed then I task you with attending and protecting her just as you would with me. She may not be queen here but she is mine and should be treated as an esteemed guest of mine, is that clear?"

The Volva bowed in response, the clansmen and council reluctantly following suit.

"As your king, I shall do my best to restore this realm to its rightful glory, all I ask in return is you help me defend it and fight by my side as friends, allies, and as one. I'm more than aware one such enemy of yours has long since been destroyed as well as its realm of Asgard but know this, a bigger one is coming and it won't stop till it wipes out the universe or we kill it. So I give you this choice here and now, we can be the monsters Asgardians made us to be...or we can be warriors!" A chorus of war cries echoed throughout the room as the clansmen and council cheered in agreement. Loki stood up from his seat on the throne then and looked at his subjects with the steely gaze of the bossass king he was destined to be. The Volva went to their knees first, then the councilmen, then finally the clansmen. I couldn't help but grin widely, how long had Loki demanded people kneel before him and now he didn't even need to ask them to do so, the sign of a true king. My baby's all powered up and off to conquer realms. "Any words you'd like to add?" he asked me then.

I smirked and shrugged. "Hail to the king, baby."


End file.
